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[the teaser of the very first episode, "Matt Gets It."]
John Wayne:
Good evening. My name's Wayne. Some of you may have seen me before. I hope so. I've been kicking around Hollywood a long time. I've made a lot of pictures out here. All kinds. Some of them have been westerns and that's what I'm here to tell you about tonight. A western. A new television show called "Gunsmoke". When I first heard about the show "Gunsmoke", I knew there was only one man to play in it. James Arness. He's a young fellow, and maybe new to some of you. But I've worked with him and I predict he'll be a big star. And now I'm proud to present "Gunsmoke".
Kitty Russell:
Matt, you can't account for everything that happens to people who touch you. You know, I learned a long time ago, there are some things in this life that you just accept the way they are.
U.S. Marshal Matt Dillon:
That's pretty deep for a redhead.
Kitty Russell:
I'm a pretty deep redhead.
Festus Haggen:
Don't you think somebody oughta reckon with him, Matthew?
U.S. Marshal Matt Dillon:
What did you say his name was again, Festus?
Festus Haggen:
I think its Sinclair... Jack Sinclair.
U.S. Marshal Matt Dillon:
He's got no left hand?
Festus Haggen:
That's right. Anyways, don't you think somebody ought to go reckon with him?
U.S. Marshal Matt Dillon:
No!
Festus Haggen:
Why not, Matthew?
U.S. Marshal Matt Dillon:
Because it was my bullet that took his hand!
Dr. Galen 'Doc' Adams:
I'll tell you why the Hagens live so long.
Festus Haggen:
Why?
Dr. Galen 'Doc' Adams:
'Cause they're too dumb to know they're dead!
U.S. Marshal Matt Dillon:
[to any man seemingly planning to go gunning for somebody.] If you're gonna to use that gun, you better start on me.
Louie Pheeters:
[sitting at the bar in episode "Slocum"] Excepting some women, of course, just ain't nothing prettier than a full bottle.
Dr. Galen 'Doc' Adams:
[Festus offers to buy Doc a beer with a silver dollar that he earned from shoeing horses in episode "Whelan's Men".] Why don't you take that money and invest it in something? Why don't you do that?
Festus Haggen:
Invest it in what?
Dr. Galen 'Doc' Adams:
There's wonderful land values outside of Dodge. Now why don't you go out there someplace, look around, and buy yourself a lot?
Festus Haggen:
A lot of what?
Dr. Galen 'Doc' Adams:
A lot! A lot of land!
Festus Haggen:
Well fiddle, I can't afford to buy a lot of land. You probably could the way you've been a bilking and gouging...
Dr. Galen 'Doc' Adams:
Oh, hush up! I'm trying to help you, for heaven sakes. It don't cost a whole lot to buy a little lot.
Festus Haggen:
What do you mean it don't cost a whole lot to buy a little, or a whole lot to buy a lot, what do you mean?
Dr. Galen 'Doc' Adams:
Well, I mean,... a little lot of land!
Festus Haggen:
But there ain't no such a thing. A little's a little, and a lot's a lot, there ain't no little lot, or lot of little, don't you see? Now you want that beer or don't you?
Dr. Galen 'Doc' Adams:
No I'm... I'm all worn out.
Festus Haggen:
[and as Doc walks away Festus Hollers] If you change your mind me and Newly will be over at the Longbranch having a whole lot of little beers.
[Chuckles and flips his silver dollar]
Festus Haggen:
Now I'm buying.
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