A Southern soccer mom with three kids sees her life come crashing down when she finds out that her dentist husband has impregnated his hygie...更多>
Barbra Jean: Aw, there's my Reba-Rooba-Roo! Reba: [cheerfully] Call me that again and I'll slap the blonde right off ya! Cheyenne: Kyra, guess what Elisabeth's first word was. Kyra: Help? Reba: Do you know what a teenager is? Barbra Jean: A demon? Reba: Do you know what a teenager is? Barbra Jean: A demon... But I'm scared. Reba: Of course you're scared - you're living with a demon! Barbra Jean: [to Kyra] You bring people together. You're like a little Reverend Al Sharpton. Barbra Jean: Maybe next time I'll marry someone who's ex-wife appreciates me! Reba: Kyra, what on Earth would make you wanna hit someone? Cheyenne: It's her way of showing affection. Kyra: Yeah, that's right. Now why don't you come over here for a little hug. Reba: I know what Kyra is doing! Brock Hart: Like you did with Cheyenne? Reba: Oh, one time! The one time our daughter gets pregnant and I never hear the end of it! [Cheyenne, 18, is planning her shotgun wedding] Cheyenne: Oh my gosh, honey, this is so much fun! We should have gotten married our junior year! Reba: No, sweetheart, you were right to wait. Reba: [when Kyra is helping B.J. feel better after she and Brock seperate] You're a beautiful young woman. Kyra: Or maybe you just raised me right. And I watch a lot of "7th Heaven". Reba: [when Kyra is helping cheer Barbra Jean up after she and Brock seperate] You are a beautiful young woman. Kyra: Or maybe you just raised me right. That and I watch a lot of "7th Heaven". Electrician: [to Barbara Jean, about Reba] Wow, your mom's a real grouch. [Barbara Jean looks flattered] Electrician: [pause] Barbra Jean: I know, right? Reba: If Thanksgiving were a concert the turkey would be Cher. Reba:
If Thanksgiving were a concert, the turkey would be Cher.
Barbra Jean: So, you want to have Thanksgiving here, and you want Cher? Reba: That's right. I've got turkey, babe! Reba: Hey, Jake. What are you watching? Jake Hart: The Weather Channel. More rain for Brazil. Reba: [when Van gets an injury involving his spine and tail bone] It's a mother-in-law's job to make the best of a bad situation. Van Montgomery: [sarcastically] I thought it was a mother-in-law's job to make butt-jokes about her son-in-law. Reba: We wear many hats. [Reba is shocked by Barbera Jean's new Reba haircut] Barbra Jean: So, what do you think? Is it me? Reba: [furiously] No. It's me! Reba: It's a mother-in-law's job to make the best out of a bad situation. Van Montgomery: [sarcastically] I thought it was a mother-in-law's job to make butt-jokes about her son-in-law. Reba: We wear many hats. Van Montgomery: I broke my butt! Barbra Jean: [in the hospital, after Cheyenne had a false labor, Barbra Jean sits down on a chair] Oh, my God! I think my water just broke! Reba: Oh no, you're sitting on my purse! Reba: Jake Mitchell Hart are you lying to me? Jake Hart: Yes! No one mocks me and gets away with it! Reba: So, did that boy even go upstairs? Jake Hart: No! And I didn't no he was a boy, I thought he was an ugly girl! Reba: You are in big trouble! no tv, no dessert, and Grandma gets her cell phone back! [She takes the gameboy SP back and Jake runs upstairs] Barbra Jean: Boop! You've got mail! [opens Kyra's laptop and makes poses] Reba: [to Brock] Boop! You've got a goof-ball! Reba: You treat that animal like it can walk on water! Barbra Jean: What is "dog" spelled backwards reba? [conversation about why barbara jean's dog is missing goes on for another 2 minutes] Van Montgomery: GOD! it spells god. Kyra: I thought you said Barbra Jean is where brain cells go when they die. [Van is sleeping, drooling on his sheets. Reba comes in telling him to wake up] Van Montgomery: Awwww! I was dreaming about waffles! Van Montgomery:
I'll be with my friends, you'll be with yours. Then we'll hook up later. It'll be just like junior year! Except we're married, you're pregnant, and everything is different.