办公室The Office(2005)

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

It's simply beyond words. It's incalculacable. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[during a "Diversity Day" exercise; Angela is wearing a sign on her forehead that says "Jamaican."] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Kevin: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Hey. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Angela: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Hey. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Kevin: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You wanna go to the beach? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Angela: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Sure. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Kevin: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You wanna get high? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Angela: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

No. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Kevin: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I think you do, mon. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Jim set a fence of pencils up between Dwight and his desk] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Your pencils are creating a health hazard. I could fall and pierce an organ. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Someone forged medical information, and that's a felony. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

OK, Whoa, all right 'cause that's a pretty intense accusation. How do you know that they're fake? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[reading from a sheet] Uh, Leprosy, Flesh Eating Bacteria, Hot Dog Fingers, Government Created Killer Nano Robot Infection. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Because right now, this is a job. If I advance any higher, this would be my career. And if this were my career, I'd have to throw myself in front of a train. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

This is our receptionist, Pam. If you think she's cute now, you should have seen her a couple years ago. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What is the single most important thing for a company? Is it the building? Is it the stock? Is it the turnover? It's the people. The *people*. My proudest moment here wasn't when I increased profits by 17%, or cut expenditure without losing a single member of staff. No, no, no, no. It was a young Guatamalan guy, first job in the country, hardly spoke a word of English, but he came to me and he went "Mr. Scott, will you be the Godfather to my child?" Wow. *Wow.* Didn't work out in the end. We had to let him go. He sucked. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I guess the atmosphere that I've tried to create here is that I'm a friend first and a boss second, and probably an entertainer third. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I don't think it would be the worst thing if they let me go. Because then I might... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[pauses] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Its just, I don't think it's many girls' dream to be a receptionist. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dammit, he put my stapler in jello again! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Points to Michael] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You can be a witness to this. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

2a 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

feb 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[eating jello] How do you know it was me? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You'll notice, I didn't have anybody being Arab. I thought that would be too explosive, uh, no pun intended. But I just thought, "too soon" for Arabs, maybe next year. You know, the ball's in their court. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

This is an environment of welcoming, and you should just get the hell outta here. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[running into work after discovering it really was a Friday] I'm here! It's okay! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I'm friends with everybody in this office. We're all best friends. I love everybody here. But sometimes your best friends start coming into work late and start having dentist appointments that aren't dentist appointments, and that is when it's nice to let them know that you could beat them up. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah, I went hunting once. Shot a deer in the leg. Had to kill it with a shovel. Took about an hour. Why do you ask? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Would I ever leave this company? Look, I'm all about loyalty. In fact, I feel like part of what I'm being paid for here is my loyalty. But if there were somewhere else that valued loyalty more highly, I'm going wherever they value loyalty the most. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

The thing about Jim is... when he's excited about something- like the Office Olympics- he gets really into it and he does a really great job. But the problem with Jim is that he works here so... that hardly ever happens. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Phyllis: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[the employees are listing what books they would like to read on a desert island] The DaVinci Code. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Angela: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

The DaVinci Code. I would bring The DaVinci Code. So I could burn The DaVinci Code. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah right, that would keep you warm for like 7 seconds. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yes, I have acted before. I was in a production of Oklahoma in the seventh grade. I played the part of Mutey, the mailman. They had too many kids so they made up roles like that... I was good. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yes. It is true. I, Michael Scott, am signing up with an online dating service. Thousands of people have done it, and I am going to do it. I need a username, and... I have a great one. "Little Kid Lover". That way people will know exactly where my priorities are at. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Edward R. Meow: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Michael and the employees kids are watching the young Michael on an old puppet show] So, tell me, what do you wanna be when you grow up? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Young Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I wanna be married and have 100 kids so I can have 100 friends, and no one can say no to being my friend. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Edward R. Meow: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Long pause] Uh... oh, ok. Well, nice talking with you, Michael. Back to you, Miss Trudy! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Melissa Hudson: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[after Michael turns off the clip] Did you get married? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Uh, no... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Abby: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Why not? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

2c 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

fec 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Uh, it just never happened. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Sasha: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

So, do you have any kids? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Uh, nope. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jake Palmer: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Do you have a girlfriend? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I do ok. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Melissa Hudson: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Was Chet Montgomery cool back then? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jake Palmer: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Even I have a girlfriend. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ok. Alright, ok. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Sasha: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

So you didn't get to be who you wanted to be. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[pause] I guess not... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Talking quietly to Angela with Ryan nearby, trying badly to hide their affair] What about that meeting later to... discuss finances? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Angela: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yes... but don't expect any cookie. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Slowly] But what if I'm hungry? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Angela: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

No cookie. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ryan Howard: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Knowing what they were really talking about, stares into the camera at a total loss for words] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oscar: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Both my parents were born in Mexico, and they moved to the United States a year before I was born, so I grew up in the United States... my parents were Mexican. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Wow, that is a great story. That's the American dream right there, right? Um, let me ask you, is there a term besides 'Mexican' that you prefer? Something less offensive? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I am Michael, and I am part English, Irish, German, and Scottish, sort of a virtual United Nations. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

In the wild, there is no health care. In the wild, health care is, "Ow, I hurt my leg. I can't run. A lion eats me and I'm dead." Well, I'm not dead. I'm the lion, you're dead. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

There's nothing new. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

That's not what you said earlier. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oh, do you want me to repeat the messages that I gave you before? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

The most sacred thing I do is care... Today I am in charge of picking a great new healthcare plan. Right? That's what this is all about. Does that make me their doctor? Um, yes. Like a specialist. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jan Levinson-Gould: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Some times a manager - like yourself - has to deliver the bad news to the employees. I do it all the time. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oh yeah, when have you ever done that? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jan Levinson-Gould: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I'm doing it right now, to you. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Last night on "Trading Spouses," there's... did you see it? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

No, I have a life. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Interesting, what's that like? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You should try it some time. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Wow. But then who would watch my TV? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

2d 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

f9a 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Okay, first, let's go over some parameters. How many people can I fire? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Uh, none: you're picking a healthcare plan. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Please knock, this is an office. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

It 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[pointing to sign] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

says "work space". 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Same thing. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

If it's the same thing, then why'd you write "work space"? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Through concentration, I can raise and lower my cholesterol at will. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Why would you wanna raise your cholesterol? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

So I can lower it. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jan Levinson-Gould: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[on phone] Dwight, listen to me very carefully: you are not a manager of anything. Understand? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

That's not entirely true, because he put me in charge of picking a healthcare plan. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jan Levinson-Gould: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Really? Okay, when Michael gets back, you tell him to call me immediately. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Call you immediately, good. Hey listen, since I have you on the phone, um, can I fire Jim? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jan Levinson-Gould: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

No. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Number one: Inverted Penis. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Meredith: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Could you mean vagina? Cause if you do, I want that covered. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I thought your vagina was removed during your hysterectomy. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Meredith: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

A uterus is different from a vagina. I still have a vagina. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I learned improv from the greats, like Drew Carey and Ryan Styles. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I think if I was allergic to dairy I'd kill myself. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

God, this is so sad, this is the smallest amount of power I've ever seen go to someone's head. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I'm just saying Roy is very competitive and he wants to take the waverunners to the lake this Saturday, so... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Well I'm going to the outlet mall on Saturday, so if you wanna save big on brand names, and Roy has to work, which he will, because I'm also competitive, you should feel free to come along. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Um, I think I'm gonna be up at the lake. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I think I'll see you at the mall... yeah. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[trying to motivate an employee for the basketball game] You'll be like the dwarf that follows the wizard to the end of the earth in... uh... Lord of the Rings! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gimli. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

...NERD. THAT's why you're not on the team. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

9d 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I know 'grumble grumble', but you would follow me to the ends of the earth grumblin' all the way. Like that uh dwarf from "Lord of the Rings". 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

ffb 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gimli. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Nerd. That is why you're not on the team. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Just tryin' to be helpful. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oh ul, I'll ul. Dragon Slayer. Ten point power sword. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

That's him. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I need something personal... like an illness. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Well, she had a hysterectomy. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Which one is that again? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

That's when they remove the uterus -... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

No! Dwight! God... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Studies show that more information is passed through watercooler gossip than through official memos, which puts me at a disadvantage because 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[picks up water bottle] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I bring my own water to work. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

The purse girl hits everything on my checklist: creamy skin, straight teeth, curly hair, amazing breasts. Not for me... for my children. The Schrutes produce very thirsty babies. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Michael attempts to assemble a basketball team and Oscar, of Mexican descent, approaches] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oscar: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I can play, if you need any help. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I will use your talents come baseball season, my friend. Or if we ever decide to box. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

A lot of the people here don't get trophies very often, like Meridith or Kevin. I mean who's gonna give Kevin an award, Dunkin' Donuts? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Toby: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I need to talk to you in your office, it'll just take two seconds. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Literally two seconds? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Toby is in HR, which technically means he works for corporate, so he's really not a part of our family. Also, he's divorced, so he's really not a part of his family. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Diversity Day exercise; Dwight has a card on his head that says "Asian"] ... lots of cultures eat rice, that doesn't help me. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I have been Michael's number two guy for about five years, and we make a great team. We're like one of those classic famous teams. He's like Mozart and I'm like Mozart's friend. No, I'm like Butch Cassidy and Michael is like Mozart. You try and hurt Mozart, you're gonna get a bullet in your head, courtesy of Butch Cassidy. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[about the office awards the Dundees] You know what they say about a car wreck, where it's so awful you can't look away? The Dundees are like a car wreck that you want to look away from but you have to stare at it because your boss is making you. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[to the tune of "We Didn't Start The Fire"] Joe McCarthy, Richard Nixon, Studebaker, television, North Korea, South Korea, Marilyn Monroe, Ryan started the fire! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

So you got the fax. So why didn't you add it to the resume? What do you mean? Of course martial arts training is relevant. Oh excuse me, I know about a billion Asians that would beg to differ. Uh, yeah, I get a little frustrated when I'm dealing with incompetence. Well, you know what? You can go to hell and I will see you there. Burning. Fine. Oh, wait, so you'll let me know when you've made a decision? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ryan's Voicemail: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Seven new messages. First new message: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Hi, Ryan. This is Saddam Hussein. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ryan's Voicemail: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Next message: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Hey, Ryan, this is your girlfriend and I'm mad. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[trying to make Dwight think that it's Friday] Hey, did you watch The Apprentice last night? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah, I can't believe who they kicked out! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oh, I know! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Damn it! I missed it! I was out drinking with my Laser Tage Team, I can't believe I did that! I never go out on Thursday nights. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[looks down shaking his head] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[raises hands in the air whispering] Yes! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight thinks it's Friday so that's what I'm going to be doing this afternoon. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Just have Dwight punch you. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oh, yeah! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[scoffs] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Well, that would be kinda worthless because I know a ton of 14-year-old girls who can kick his ass. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You know a ton of 14-year-old girls? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What belt are they? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

The Albany branch is working right through lunch, to prevent downsizing. But, Michael, he decided to extend our lunch by an hour, so that we could all go down to the dojo and watch him fight Dwight. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Would I rather be feared or loved? Um... Easy, both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

My roommate wants to meet everybody. Because I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm making Dwight up. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[takes a deep breath, shakes head] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

He is very real. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[sighs] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[just arrived at party, uninvited, and notices I.T. guy, who wears a turban] Aw, come on! That guy? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[pauses, looks at camera] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

He is a good guy, not a terrorist. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I suggested we flip a coin, but Angela said she doesn't like to gamble. Of course by saying that, she was gambling that I wouldn't smack her. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I hope nobody takes this baby cause this is great. Wow, look at that fine craftsmanship. Somebody really put a lot of work into that. It's beautiful. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

< 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

ffb 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

b>Meredith: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I'll take the oven mitt. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Sssssssucker! See, I wanted somebody to take it! Reverse psychology! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Reverse psychology is an awesome tool, I don't know if you guys know about it, but basically you can make someone think the opposite of what you believe, and that tricks them into doing something stupid. Works like a charm. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Kevin: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I got myself for Secret Santa. I was supposed to tell somebody, but I didn't. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[smiles] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yankee Swap is like Machiavelli meets... Christmas. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Kevin: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I want the footbath. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Kevin: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

That's the thing I bought myself. I'm really psyched to use it. Maybe I should've taken the iPod. Oh, shoot! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Downsizing? I have no problem with that. I have been recommending downsizing since I first got here. I even brought it up in my interview. I say, bring it on. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Phyllis: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[at the Christmas party] Hi, guys. Does everyone know my boyfriend, Bob Vance? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Kevin: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[introducing himself to Bob] Kevin Malone. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Bob Vance: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Bob Vance. Vance Refrigeration. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Stanley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Stanley Hudson. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Bob Vance: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Bob Vance. Vance Refrigeration. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ryan Howard: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ryan Howard. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Bob Vance: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Bob Vance. Vance Refrigeration. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ryan Howard: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Kevin, Stanley, and Ryan all smile to themselves] What line of work are you in, Bob? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

That is a perfectly good mini Christmas tree. We are going to sell that to charity because that is what Christmas is all about. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Happy birthday, Jesus. Sorry your party is so lame! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ryan Howard: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[sees Todd's License plate is WLHUNG] You a big William Hung fan? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Todd Packer: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Why does everyone ask me that? Who the hell is that? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael stands in front of the boat and says he's king of the world within the first hour, or I give you my next paycheck. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[holds up his injured foot, which is wrapped in plastic] What does this look like to you? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Stanley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Mailboxes, Etc. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I enjoy having breakfast in bed. I like waking up to the smell of bacon, sue me. And since I don't have a butler, I have to do it myself. So, most nights before I go to bed, I will lay six strips of bacon out on my George Foreman grill. Then I go to sleep. When I wake up, I plug in the grill. I go back to sleep again. Then I wake up to the smell of crackling bacon. It is delicious, it's good for me, it's the perfect way to start the day. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Mint c 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

fe2 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

hocolate chip! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ryan Howard: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

If I had to, I could clean out my desk in five seconds and nobody would ever know I had ever been here. And I'd forget too. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim is a friend of mine, so the only people this crush really concerns is Jim and Pam. And me. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I want to clamp Michael's *face* in a George Foreman grill. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Otherwise it's just malfeasance for malfeasance's sake. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You know what they say the best medicine is. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Kevin: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Well, the doctor said a combination of Interferon and Dacarbazine. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

And laughter, also. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Hey, uh, can I talk to you about something? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

About when you want to give me more of your money? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

No, I... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Did you want to do that now? We can go inside. I'm feeling kind of good tonight. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I was just... I am in love with you. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[No longer smiling] What? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I'm really sorry if that's weird for you to hear, but I needed you to hear it. Probably not good timing. I know that, I just... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Stunned] What are you doing? What do you expect me to say to that? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I just needed you to know. Once. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Well, I... I can't... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You have no idea... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Don't do that... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

...what your friendship means to me. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

C'mon. I don't want to do that. I want to be more than that. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I can't. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[a small tear runs down Jim's face] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I'm really sorry... if you misinterpreted things. It's probably my fault. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Trying to recover] Not your fault. I'm sorry I misinterpreted our friendship. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I.D. badges are long overdue. Security in this office park is a joke. Last year, I came to work with my spud gun in a duffel bag. I sat at my desk all day, with a rifle that shoots potatoes at 60 pounds per square inch. Can you imagine if I was deranged? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Wow, what a terrible day to not be able to talk. Dwight was literally carrying around his own urine, and dressed like one of the Village People. Why does he do the things that he does for Michael? I just don't get it. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[We see a clip of Jim talking to Pam after he had stayed quiet for her the entire day in a game of Jinx] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What is he getting out of that relationship? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

2d 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

ffb 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Women are like wolves. If you want a wolf, you have to trap it. You have to snare it. And then you have to tame it. Keep it happy. Care for it. Feed it. Lovingly, the way an animal deserves to be loved. And my animal deserves a lot of loving. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You may look around, and see two groups here. White collar, blue collar. But I don't see it that way. You know why not? Because I am collar-blind. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I come from a long line of fighters, my maternal grandfather was the toughest guy I ever knew. World War II veteran. He killed twenty men and then spent the rest of the war in an Allied prison camp... My father battled blood pressure and obesity all his life... different kind of fight. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Go ahead, punch me. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Can't. Just got a manicure 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oh, queer! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[remembers he's on camera] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

... eye. Queer Eye. That's a good show. Important show. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oh, and another fun thing. We, at the end of the night, are going to give the check to an actual group of Boy Scouts. Right, Toby? We're gonna... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Toby: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Actually, I didn't think it was appropriate to invite children since it's, uh, you know, there's gambling and alcohol. And it's in our dangerous warehouse. And it's a school night. And, you know, Hooters is catering. Is that enou-is that enough? Should I keep going? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Why are you the way that you are? Honestly, every time I try to do something fun or exciting, you make it not... that way. I hate... so much about the things that you choose to be. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[thinking he's steering the "Booze Cruise" boat] I was the youngest pilot in Pan Am history. When I was four, the pilot let me ride in the cockpit and fly the plane with him. And I was four, and I was great and I would have landed it, but my dad wanted us to go back to our seats. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Michael's hands are tied to the rail of the Booze Cruise ship] What happened to you? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Captain Jack has a problem with authority. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oh, right, 'cause you announced that his ship was sinking 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

He just totally lost it. If you ask me he caused the panic. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What a night... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah, well. Good for you, your friend got engaged. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

She was already engaged. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Roy said the first one didn't count. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

That's... great. To tell you the truth, I used to have a big thing for pam. So... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Really. You're kidding me. You and Pam? Wow. I would have never put you two together... did you really... you really hid it well. God. I usually have a radar for stuff like that. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[sighs] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You know I made out with Jan. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah. I know. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

d7b 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah. Yeah. Well, Pam is cute. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah. She's really funny, and... she's warm, and she's just... anyway. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Well, if you like her so much, don't give up. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

She's engaged. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pift. BFD. Engaged aint married. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Huh. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Uncharacteristically serious] Never, ever, ever give up. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim Halpert: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah, on the booze cruise I... told Michael about some feelings I used to have for Pam. I... had just broken up with Katy, and... had a couple of drinks, and I confided in the world's worst confidant. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Look, about you and Jim, I... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oh no, that's-you don't have to... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I, no, I just feel it's my responsibility as your boss-slash-friend... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

No, it's really-it's ok. Um, I know that Jim, like, had a crush on me when he first started, but that was a long time ago, so... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

It wasn't that long ago. It was on the booze cruise. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Puzzled] Jim had a crush on me on the booze cruise, or he told you about it on the booze cruise? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Uh-uh. Ok... shut it, Michael. I'm done, that's it. I'm out. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Pam leaves, now wondering what really happened] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Last week I would've given a kidney to anyone in this office. I would've reached right into my stomach and pulled it out for them. But now, no. I don't have the relationship with these people that I thought I did. I hope they ask, so they can hear me say, "Uh, no, I only give my organs to my real friends. Go get yourself a monkey kidney." 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Michael Scott: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I swore to myself if I ever got to walk around the room as manager, people would laugh as they saw me coming, and they'd applaud as I walked away. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dwight Schrute: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

When I was in the 6th grade I was a finalist in our school spelling bee. It was me against Raj Patel. I misspelled, in front of the entire school, the word "failure". 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Pam Beesley: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jim cannot speak until he buys me a coke. Those are the rules of Jinx, and they are unflinchingly rigid. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

办公室 (2005)

图片(8)

演职人员(155)

肯·卡皮斯

克雷格·丹尼尔斯

Ken Whittingham

保罗·费格

查尔斯·麦克道格尔

Randall Einhorn

哈罗德·雷米斯

布赖恩·戈登

杰弗里·布里兹

Tucker Gates

丹尼·高顿

Victor Nelli Jr.

瑞奇·热维斯

斯戴芬·莫昌特

Michael Schur

李·艾森伯格

经典台词

相关推荐