绝望主妇"Desperate Housewives"(2004)

Rex: [having an allergic reaction] You put onions in my salad? Bree: No, I didn't! [looks back at table] Bree: Oh, wait. Karen McCluskey: How old are your boys anyway? [Preston and Porter look at each other] Porter Scavo: We're six. Karen McCluskey: [turns to Parker] Karen McCluskey: And you? Parker Scavo: Five. Karen McCluskey: Wow. Your mom just pops them out, doesn't she? Preston Scavo: How old are you? Karen McCluskey: How old do you think? Porter Scavo: Lynette: Do you know what psychological warfare is? [shakes his head] Porter Scavo: No? Lynette: Too bad for you. Lynette: Hi. My baby-sitter cancelled. Bree: I've got millions of errands to run so... Lynette: Please hear me out, this is important. Today I have a chance to join the human race for a few hours - there are actual adults waiting for me with margaritas. Look I'm in a dress, I have make-up on. Bree: If it were any other day? Lynette: Oh, for Gods sake, Bree, I'm wearing pantyhose. Tom: I love you because you did the right thing, and I admire your bravery. Lynette: And I love you because you find ways to compliment me when you could just say, "I told you so." [They kiss, then Tom says something in sign language] Lynette: You just signed "I told you so", didn't you? Tom: You'll never prove it. Karl: The heart wants what it wants! Susan: Yeah, well, my heart wants to hurt you, but I'm able to control myself! Julie: When was the last time you had sex? [Susan stops what she is doing] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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: Are you mad that I asked? Susan: No, I'm just trying to remember. [George has dinner with the Van De Kamps] Andrew Van De Kamp: So, George, can I ask you a question? And it's kind of personal. George Williams: Sure. Andrew Van De Kamp: Have you ever actually been with a woman? George Williams: [chuckling] Excuse me? Andrew Van De Kamp: Well, let's be honest. I think it's obvious by the way that you talk and act that you're not a player, so I was just curious to find out if you had ever actually gotten in the game. George Williams: My experience with women is none of your business. Andrew Van De Kamp: Oh, I think it is. I mean, you're dating my mom. And we both know that at your age, dating's a little more than just holding hands. George Williams: We're not dating exactly. Andrew Van De Kamp: Oh, sure you are. And you know what? I think it's great. But I wanna make sure my mom's happy, you know, and it would really set my mind at ease to know that she's with a guy that knows how to please a lady. George Williams: This is inappropriate. Andrew Van De Kamp: You know, my parents had a great sex life. Man, I heard 'em through the wall of my bedroom once. George Williams: Please shut up. Andrew Van De Kamp: You should've heard my mom, too. She had this... this weird moan. It was kind of like, um... [Andrew makes a moan that's followed by an unh!] Andrew Van De Kamp: Isn't that bizarre? That's the sound my mom makes when she climaxes. [a dumbfounded George looks at Andrew while Bree and Danielle enter with cobblers] Bree Van De Kamp: Okay, time for cobbler. Sorry, one of the dessert plates doesn't match. I tried to replace it, but it's Spode Florence. It's a rare pattern. It belonged to my grandmother. But hopefully once you taste the dessert, you'll forget all about it. George Williams: I'm not hungry. Bree Van De Kamp: George, you have to have this. It's absolutely scrumptious. [Bree takes a bite] Bree Van De Kamp: Mmm. Mmm! [George looks from Bree to Andrew, who points to Bree and mouths "That's it." George slams his fist and stands up] George Williams: Go to your room! Andrew Van De Kamp: Isn't that weird? That's the sound my mom makes when she climaxes! Bree: Andrew, you remember Reverend Sikes, don't you? Andrew Van De Kamp: Oh, come on. Bree: Um, Reverend, why don't you, um, have seat, and I will get some refreshments? [the reverend sits down at the dining room table where Andrew is sitting and Rex is pouring wine] Reverend Sikes: Ah. So, Andrew, it's been a long time. Andrew Van De Kamp: Yes. Yes, it has. Bree: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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Would you like some water? I have flat or bubbly. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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Reverend Sikes: Oh, bubbly, please. So, your mother tells me you've started having some sexual desires for other boys. [Andrew stares at his mother who smiles back lovingly. Andrew looks at the wine] Andrew Van De Kamp: I don't suppose I could get some of that. Rex Van De Kamp: I'm gonna need every drop. Reverend Sikes: And over the years, we've had so many young people come to our ministry hating themselves for their unnatural desires, and within a few months, they've found an inner peace and a tranquility that is nothing short of miraculous. Bree Van De Kamp: Oh. [Bree reaches over and touches Andrew's arm. Andrew smiles back at his mother] Reverend Sikes: And all it takes is a little faith and a desire to change. Andrew Van De Kamp: I'm sorry, but I, I really don't want to talk about my sex life. Bree Van De Kamp: Well, that's just too bad, because this needs to be discussed. Reverend Sikes: Bree, please, let the boy speak. Go on. Andrew Van De Kamp: Well, I appreciate your offer to help. I do. But I don't hate myself. So, I'm good. Reverend Sikes: Son, I know what it's like to be a teenager. It's a very confusing time. Andrew Van De Kamp: I'm not confused. I know exactly who I am. Bree: How could we have all forgotten about this? Lynette: We didn't exactly forget. It's just usually when the hostess dies, the party is off. Julie: [mocking Susan] Dear diary, Mike doesn't even know I'm alive. Susan: Shut up. Yao Lin: I don't like lies. Gabrielle: Yeah, well I don't like your ironing. So there. Bree Van De Kamp: Reverend, I don't mean to criticize, but it sounds like you're giving up. Reverend Sikes: Well, we can't force him on the path of righteousness. He himself has got to want to make the journey. Bree Van De Kamp: Well, then, what do we do, just stand by while he starts dating boys? [to Andrew] Bree Van De Kamp: And by the way, the correct word is not "gay." It's "sodomy." Rex Van De Kamp: We're in the middle of dinner. Bree Van De Kamp: So? Rex Van De Kamp: So, can you at least wait until desert before calling our son a sodomite? Bree Van De Kamp: How you can sit there and be so casual is beyond me. Rex Van De Kamp: For starters, I knew this dinner was a bad idea the moment you suggested it. Bree Van De Kamp: Well, at least I'm trying to be pro-active! Reverend Sikes: Please, there's no need to get upset. Bree Van De Kamp: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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I am upset because there is a problem here and no-one seems to notice it but me. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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Rex Van De Kamp: As far as I'm concerned, if Andrew is happy with who he is, then it is our job to support him! [brief silence] Bree Van De Kamp: [to Andrew] Your father is into S&M. Rex Van De Kamp: Bree! Bree Van De Kamp: He makes me beat him with a riding crop and I let him. It's no wonder you're perverted. Look who your parents are. [Bree gets up and leaves] Rex Van De Kamp: Excuse me. [Rex leaves too] Andrew Van De Kamp: [to Reverend Sikes] What a fun night. You know, we should really do this again sometime. [watching an S&M video demonstration with Rex] Bree Van De Kamp: What did your mother *do* to you? Gabrielle: I want a sexy little convertible! And I want to buy one, right now! Maserati Saleswoman: I'll go start the paperwork. Gabrielle: Well, not this one. I... vomited in this one. Mary Alice: Yes, each new day in suburbia brings with it a new set of lies. The worst are the ones we tell ourselves right before we fall asleep. We whisper them in the dark, telling ourselves we're happy, or that he's happy. That we can change, or that he will change his mind. We persuade ourselves that we can live with our sins, or that we can live without him. Yes, each night before we fall asleep we lie to ourselves in a desperate, desperate hope that come morning - it will all be true. [after reading the blackmail note] Susan: Oh, Mary Alice, what did you do? [after Mary Alice kills Diedre with a knife] Paul Young: Oh, Mary Alice! What have you done? [after killing Diedre, Mary Alice brings a toy chest from upstairs] Paul Young: What are we going to do? Mary Alice: You said they were pouring the concrete for the pool tomorrow. Paul Young: You can't be serious! Mary Alice: They'll never find her. We can put her in this. [points to the toy chest] Paul Young: She wont fit! Mary Alice: Then we'll have to make her fit! [Mary Alice starts checking Diedre's arm] Paul Young: What are you doing? Mary Alice: Checking for track marks. [after killing Diedre, Mary Alice brings a toy chest from upstairs] Paul Young: What are we going to do? Mary Alice: You said they were pouring the concrete for the pool to mould. Paul Young: You cant be serious! Mary Alice: They'll never find her. We can put her in this. [points to the toy chest] Paul Young: She wont fit! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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: Then we'll have to make her fit! [Mary Alice starts checking Diedre's arm] Paul Young: What are you doing? Mary Alice: Checking for track marks. Bree: [speaking to her son after she catches him in a strip club] Andrew, I'm curious. When you fantasize about this woman, do you ever stop to think how she came to be on this runway? That's someone's little girl. And that someone probably had a lot of dreams for her. Dreams that did not include a thong... and a pole... [about the kids] Lynette: Why don't I just put them back in me and cook 'em until they're civilized? Tom: You'd be cool with that? Bree: Girls, you don't understand. This poor kid is scared out of his mind. Gabrielle: Oh, for God's sake, Bree. You're a woman. Manipulate him. That's what we do. Bree: But how? Gabrielle: I don't know. How did you usually manipulate Rex? [Bree thinks about it, and smiles] Bree: I love sex. I love everything about it: the sensations, the smells. I especially love the feel of a man. All that muscle and sinew pressed against my body. And then when you add friction. MMMmmmm. The tactile sensation of running my tongue over a man's nipple ever so gently. And then there's the act itself; two bodies becoming one in that final eruption of pleasure. To be honest, the only thing I don't like about sex is the scrotum. I mean obviously it has its practical applications but I'm just not a fan. Mary Alice: It's a rare man that understands the value of a perfect rose. Susan: Hey, Edie! Edie: Wow, get a load of you. You look so pretty. I hardly recognize you. Gabrielle: Before we got married we made a deal, remember? No kids. Carlos: Deals are meant to be renegotiated. Gabrielle: We're not negotiating my uterus. [Bree is compulsively fixing a button on Dr. Goldfine's jacket during their session] Dr. Goldfine: I'm sure Freud would not approve of this. Bree: Oh, who cares what he thinks. I took psychology in college. We learned all about Freud. A miserable human being. Dr. Goldfine: What makes you say that? Bree: Well, think about it. He grew up in the late 1800s. There were no appliances back then. His mother had to do everything by hand, just backbreaking work from sunup to sundown, not to mention the countless other sacrifices she probably had to make to take care of her family. And what does he do? He grows up and becomes famous, peddling a theory that the problems of most adults can be traced back to something awful their mother has done. She must have felt so betrayed. He saw how hard she worked. He saw what she did for him. Did he even ever think to say thank you? I doubt it. Bree: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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[the doctor has just called to tell Bree that Rex is dead] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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No, no - of course. You did everything you could. [Bree hangs up the phone, gracefully finishes cleaning her silverware... and then begins to cry uncontrollably] Rex: Bree... I think I'm having a heart attack! Bree: No, you're not! [after the kids bite and knock the beefy middle-aged woman over] Lynette Scavo: Run, boys, run! [a motorcycle cop pulls Lynette over] Officer Hayes: License and registration, please. [she hands them to him] Officer Hayes: Ma'am, you know why I pulled you over? [she looks at the kids in the back] Lynette Scavo: I have a theory. Officer Hayes: The kids were jumping up and down. They should be sitting, wearing their seatbelts. Lynette Scavo: I yelled at them. They never listen to me. It's very frustrating. Officer Hayes: Well, you have to find a way control them. After all, that's your job. [he hands her the ticket and walks off] Mary Alice Young: [narrating] Though he'd been a policeman for six years, Officer Hayes had never found himself in a truly dangerous situation. Then again, he had never before told a woman how to raise her children. [Lynette furiously gets out of her car and slowly approaches Officer Hayes] Lynette Scavo: Are you saying I'm a bad mother? Officer Hayes: Ma'am, you need to get back in your car, please. Lynette Scavo: I have no help. My husband's always away on business. Officer Hayes: I'm gonna have to ask you to step back now. Lynette Scavo: My babysitter joined the Witness Relocation Program! I haven't slept through the night... [Officer Hayes slowly reaches for his gun] Officer Hayes: Ma'am. Lynette Scavo: ...in six years. And for you to stand there and judge me... [she stands in front of Officer Hayes, who's terrified. He looks at the children, who are acting terrible] Officer Hayes: OK. I'm not gonna give you a ticket. I'm just gonna let you off with a warning. Lynette Scavo: I accept your apology. [she takes the warning, sighs, and gets back in the car] Officer Hayes: Buckle up. Bree: Yes, well, I have some bad news. Rex died. Bree: I cannot afford to break down right now. Susan: Why not? Bree: [Rex's mother pulls up] You'll see why in a moment. Betty Applewhite: Bree, us widows have to stick together. Betty Applewhite: In the future, leave the cleverness to me. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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: You are no longer invited to the funeral. Phyllis Van De Kamp: What? Reverend Sikes: You're not serious. Bree Van De Kamp: Oh, yes, I am. I am going to hire security. And those security men are going to have sticks and if you so much as set foot in that sanctuary, they will be instructed to beat you with those sticks. Reverend Sikes: Bree, this is your grief talking. Bree Van De Kamp: Reverend, if you don't back me up on this, so help me, I will pull the funeral out of your church! Reverend Sikes: Bree! Bree Van De Kamp: I am not kidding. I will go non-denominational so fast, it will make your head spin. Andrew Van De Kamp: Mom, Grandma's leaving. All right, you have to talk to her. Bree Van De Kamp: No, I don't. If you heard the things that she said to me... Andrew Van De Kamp: Look, I'm sure she was a real bitch, OK, but she's family, so that makes her our bitch. Let her say goodbye to Dad. Andrew Van De Kamp: She went out of her way to be cruel to me. I don't want her at the funeral. Danielle Van De Kamp: [crying] Mom, if you don't let Grandma come, I will never forgive you! Andrew Van De Kamp: [to Danielle] Did I ask for your help? [to Bree] Andrew Van De Kamp: You know Dad would want her there. Bree: [Rex has just admitted that he is a masochist] What the hell did your mother do to you? Bree: Okay, now I want you to hold the gun like you're holding a beautiful white dove. Hold it firmly enough that it can't get away, but not so firmly that you can kill it. Edie: [Susan walks over to Edie deliberately to show off and looks very stylish and beautiful] Wow! Look at you! Susan: Yeah... I have a date... with Mike. We kissed, FYI... [Susan leaves, leaving Edie with her mouth wide-open] Edie: [Susan comes back from Mike canceling the date] So, how was the big date? Susan: Mike had to reschedule. Edie: Aww... 'cause of the hot girl? With the suitcase? Over there? FYI! Mr. Shaw: Sometimes evil drives a minivan. Paul Young: [asking about selling the house] Will I have to tell them about my wife's death in the house? Edie: [applying make-up] Yeah. Legal crap. People get really freaked out by suicides. Hell, I get the willies just standing here. Paul Young: Is there any other option? Edie: [applying lipstick] Well, you could say that she shot herself in the house, then crawled out back to die... John Rowland: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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You know what I don't get? Gabrielle: What? John Rowland: Why you married Mr. Solis. Gabrielle: Well, he promised to give me everything I've ever wanted. John Rowland: Well, did he? Gabrielle: Yes. John Rowland: Then... why aren't you happy? Gabrielle: Turns out I wanted all the wrong things. John Rowland: So. Do you love him? Gabrielle: [sighs] I do. John Rowland: Well, then, why are we here? Why are we doing this? Gabrielle: Because I don't wanna wake up some morning with a sudden urge to blow my brains out. Edie: [Susan is modeling at a charity fashion show and walks off the catwalk looking tattered, dress ripped to shreds and humiliated] She never looked better! Bree: Danielle! How was school. Danielle: It was okay. Bree: Good. Where does Andrew keep his marijuana? [Rex has asked for a divorce in a family restaurant] Rex: Are we gonna talk about what I said? Bree: If you think I'm gonna discuss the dissolution of my marriage in a place where the restrooms are labeled Chicks and Dudes, you are out of your mind. Bree: [to Rex, in the hospital, after a heart attack] I know you still love me. Maisy told me. As of this moment, Rex, I am no longer your wife. I am going to find the most vindictive lawyer I can find. And together, we will eviscerate you. I will take away your money, your family, and your dignity. And I am thrilled you still love me. Because I want what's going to happen to you to hurt as much as humanly possible. I'm just so glad you didn't die before I told you that. George Williams: Well... I'll see you, Dr. Van De Kamp. Rex: Please, you're dating my wife. Call me Rex. Rex: Look at you... going out? Bree: Not that it's any of your business, but I have a date. Rex: A date... what kind of date? Bree: Rex, I don't want to say anything that might upset you. The doctor said any more stress could cause another heart attack. [pause] Bree: It's a romantic date with a single, attractive man and I intend to french the hell out of him. Bree: [to Rex] Please don't mistake my anal retentiveness for actual affection. Gabrielle: Damn it, John! What's our new rule? John Rowland: [sadly] Stop pretending we have a future. Mary Alice: Yes, sooner or later we must all grow up. No-one knows this better than the young. Mary Alice: An odd thing happens when we die, our senses vanish. Taste, touch, smell and sound become a distant memory, but our sight? Ah, our sight expands and we can suddenly see the world we left behind so clearly. Of course most of what's visible to the dead could also be seen by the living, if they would only take the time to look. Julie: [to Susan] I always assumed I'd have sex for the first time before you had it again. Susan: Every time we went out for pizza you could have said, "Hey, I once killed a man". [as he dresses for court in prison] Carlos: Beating up a second gay guy looks bad. Gabrielle: Yes, well, Carlos, in some circles, beating people up at all is frowned upon. [Susan finds Andrew and Justin naked in a pool] Andrew Van De Kamp: I'm not... I'm not gay. [after breaking up with Mike] Susan: Julie, mommy needs a hug! Bree: [sighting down the P-08 Luger she has been given] George! This is so much better than an orchid! Danielle: We're not like other families, are we? [Bree has told Dr. Goldfine that she's going to ignore all her problems with Rex and stay with him] Dr. Goldfine: Bree, how does this reconciliation have a chance if the two of you can't be honest about the innermost parts of your lives? Bree: We're, um, WASPs, Dr. Goldfine. Not acknowledging the elephant in the room is what we do best. Dr. Goldfine: You'd settle for that - a life filled with repression and denial? Bree: And dinner parties. Don't forget the dinner parties. [Rex has just told Bree about his masochism] Rex: For God's sake, you promised to be supportive. Bree: What do you want me to say? My husband likes to wear metal clamps around his nipples. Hooray? [Bree has agreed to try "dominating" Rex] Rex: If things do get too rough, we'll have a control word. If one of us says it, the other backs off immediately. Bree: Okay. So what's our control word? Rex: Well, lately I've been using "Philadelphia". What's wrong? Bree: Well, it's just that my Aunt Fern lives in Philadelphia, and I don't want to be thinking about her while I'm spanking you with a leather strap. Rex: Okay. Fine. You pick a control word. Bree: Um, how about "Boise"? Rex: "Boise"? Bree: What's the matter with "Boise"? Rex: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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We're going to be doing psychological role playing here, Bree, and a funny word like "Boise" would ruin the mood. We need something that sounds serious. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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Bree: Hmm. [sombre tone] Bree: How about "Palestine"? Rex: "Boise" will be just fine. John Rowland: This is great. Got tons of homework tonight. It's always easier to concentrate after sex. Gabrielle: Well, I'm glad I could help. Education's very important. Edie: What the hell kind of street do we live on, anyway? Maisy Gibbons: [jailed for prostitution, she declines Bree's offer of a deal] I'm not interested... But you do get credit for one thing: you came to visit me, even it was for an ulterior motive. None of the other girls from the Club even bothered. I've been abandoned. Guess that's what happens when you become the town whore. Bree: Oh, sweetie, they didn't abandon you because you're a whore, they abandoned you because you weren't all that nice to begin with. Susan: Do you believe in evil, Edie? Edie: Of course I believe in evil - I work in real estate. [after Andrew pushes Bree, Rex grabs him and throws him into the wall] Rex: If you ever touch your mother like that again, I will throw you right through this wall! You hear me? [Alisa Stevens is a deaf woman] Alisa Stevens: Dennis left me. Lynette: What? John Rowland: What other option do you have? Except return the shoes and get your money back. Gabrielle: Return the shoes? I can't talk to you when you're hysterical. Mary Alice: Human beings are designed for many things. Loneliness isn't one of them. Edie: [to Bree] You could have an affair with anyone and you choose the pharmacist? You are such a Republican. Carlos: Now they think I'm some kind of serial gay basher. Gabrielle: Well... [holds up police sketch] Gabrielle: you kind of are. Carlos: Hey, Gabby, aren't we breast feeding? Gabrielle: Oh, honey, if you could swing that one, more power to ya. Bree: [to Rex] When is your midlife crisis going to end, because it's really starting to tick me off! Bree: You've obviously never had to remove a cheese stain! Susan: What are you smiling about? Mike Delfino: I used to have all these questions about how you got to be the way you are. They were all just answered. Edie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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[Betty and her son Matthew have just moved into the neighborhood] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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Well, if you need me to come in at any time then, I'll... Betty Applewhite: [firmly] Edie, we are fine. Thank you. [repeated line] Bree: Oh, my heavenly days! Rex: So, these "tennis lessons" we're taking, how are we doing? Bree: My backhand is improving greatly, but you're still having problems with your serve. Zach Young: Thank you, Mrs. Van De Kamp. Bree: [turning] For what? Zach Young: Remembering my mother. [Susan just found out Karl cheated on her with Edie at a Christmas party as she is about to sing "New York, New York"] Susan Mayer: [singing] Start spreading the news. I'm leaving today. I wanna be a part of it. New York, New York. These vagabond shoes... [to Karl, spoken] Susan Mayer: You're an ass, you know that? [the pianist stops playing] Susan Mayer: No, keep playing. [singing] Susan Mayer: Are longing to stray... [to Karl, spoken] Susan Mayer: There's a word you know, right? [singing] Susan Mayer: And get around the heart of it. New York, New York. I wanna... [to Karl, spoken] Susan Mayer: just tell you that the affair was one thing! I mean, I forgave you because, on some small level, I thought that you were in love with her, and now I find out you were just groping people at parties! [singing] Susan Mayer: Top of the heap... [Karl gets up and starts to leave. Susan jumps offstage and follows him with the microphone] Susan Mayer: [shouting] Karl, don't you turn away from me! Look at me! Man in Audience: Uh-oh. Susan Mayer: You know, what else were doing during our marriage? How many other women were you sticking it to? As God as my witness, it will snow on the hills of hell before I *ever* feel sorry for you again! [everyone in the audience, including Mike and Edie, look at Susan and Karl] Susan Mayer: [singing] New York! [the pianist finishes playing "New York, New York"] Bree: [final words to Rex] You look magnificent. Carlos: We're not very nice people, are we? Gabrielle: No. We're not. Carlos: Aw, when we got married I thought we were gonna be so happy. Gabrielle: Me too. [pause] Gabrielle: Look on the bright side - at least we're still rich. Carlos: Thank God for that. Gabrielle: Pl 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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ease calm down! John Rowland: This doesn't make any sense. Okay you love me. I know you love me. Gabrielle: Love isn't enough. Where would we live? Here? With your roommates? The only decoration in the bathroom is a bong! John Rowland: We could get our own place. Gabrielle: How? You're barely making minimum wage! John Rowland: Okay, sure. We'd be poor at first, but we'd be happy. Gabrielle: I've tried poor, but happy. Guess what? Wasn't that happy! Paul Young: You know, Julie is a very special girl. Zach Young: I know. Paul Young: She could have just about any boy she wants... I think you're a wonderful kid, I do, but you're not that special, Zach, not really. Susan: It was an accident, Karl. Edie knows it was an accident, right? Karl: She knows you could've killed her. As it is, she's got a shattered tibia. Susan: Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. I sent roses. Did she get the roses? Karl: Yep, she cut herself with the thorns. [Carlos is upset because a fellow inmate is threatening to beat him up if he doesn't give him $7,000, and Gabby doesn't want him to pay] Gabrielle: You're a strong guy. You went to college on an athletic scholarship, for God's sake! Carlos: Yeah, it was for golf! Gabrielle: ...Oh. [Phyllis has been crying all time since Rex's death and stealing all the attention from Bree] Bree: For God's sake, Phyllis, don't you ever worry about dehydration? Phyllis Van De Kamp: Are you saying that I am too emotional? Bree: I'm saying that even Italians take a break now and again. Gabrielle: Why are all rich men such jerks? Carlos: The same reason why all beautiful women are bitches. Danielle Van De Kamp: Why can't we ever have normal soups? Like French Onion, or Navy Bean? Bree Van De Kamp: Well, Danielle, your father is deathly allergic to onions, and I won't even dignify your *navy bean* suggestion with a response. David: You're not willing to get a divorce, but you're willing to have an affair? Gabrielle: I said I was Catholic, not a fanatic. Edie: Well, someone might as well say it... Susan, what the hell have you been smoking? Sister Mary: Money can't buy happiness. Gabrielle: Sure it can! That's just a lie we tell poor people to keep them from rioting. Gabrielle: The way I see it is that good friends support each other after something bad has happened, great friends act as if nothing has happened. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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: Well, then, good luck on your remodel. Bree: Gabby, this is the way I see it, good friends offer to help in a crisis, great friends don't take no for an answer. Felicia Tilman: Don't look shocked, Martha, makes your face look fat. Father Crowley: You're pregnant? Gabrielle: Yes, and it's impossible. I'm on the pill which I know you probably think is a sin but it's a 9% effective sin. Father Crowley: Maybe its in the .1% that God resides. Gabrielle: You just couldn't wait to throw that in, could you? Gabrielle: The only person more self-centred than me is Carlos, he's so self-centred he doesn't even know how self-centred I am. Gabrielle: I don't even know who to be angry at. Father Crowley: Don't be angry, be thankful, children are a gift. Gabrielle: I don't have time for this crap. Tom: Forget I said it. Lynette: It's too late, you just said it. Susan: Are you OK? Gabrielle: Yeah, I just didn't realise how disgusting meat can be. Mary Alice: Trust is a fragile thing. Once earned, it affords us tremendous freedom. But once trust is lost, it can be impossible to recover. Of course the truth is, we never know who we can trust. Those we're closest to can betray us, and total strangers can come to our rescue. In the end, most people decide to trust only themselves. It really is the simplest way to keep from getting burned. Danielle Van De Kamp: [to Matt Applewhite, who has come into the backyard of the Van De Kamps looking for Caleb while Betty distracts Bree. He doesn't notice Danielle is standing by the pool in a bikini and an open robe, smoking a cigarette, with a big smile on her face] Hello. Matthew Applewhite: [Startled slightly] Oh, hello. Danielle Van De Kamp: [Still smiling] Looking for something? Matthew Applewhite: Uh, yeah. I was looking for you. Danielle Van De Kamp: [Starts walking towards him] Oh, really? Matthew Applewhite: Yeah, the day we first met, I thought you were pretty cool. Danielle Van De Kamp: So I'm wondering when you were going to ask me out. [as she says this, she walks over to one of the lounge chairs and bends over to straighten out the blanket on it, thus showing her butt to him. She turns her head towards him] Danielle Van De Kamp: 'Cause I'll say 'yes'. Edie: I know who she is Edie: She's a man eating, scum sucking hoe bag. Susan: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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There's a good explanation for this, your father broke up with Edie last night. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

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Julie: You had sex with him the night he broke up with Edie. Susan: I said it was a good explanation, not a great one. George Williams: Where are you going Bree? Bree: I'm taking my champagne and ageing eggs and I'm going. Bree: Maybe they'll just be happy for you. Gabrielle: Bree, my friends are models, they're not happy for anyone. Edie: I don't trust friendly women. Lynette: That's ok, they don't trust you either. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

绝望主妇 (2004)

演职人员(325)

Larry Shaw

David Grossman

Arlene Sanford

Jeffrey Melman

Wendey Stanzler

Fred Gerber

查尔斯·麦克道格尔

罗伯特·邓肯·麦克内尔

David Warren

马克·切利

Jenna Bans

Alexandra Cunningham

Kevin Murphy

Tom Spezialy

Joey Murphy

John Pardee

经典台词

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