[After getting hit by trainer] Joe: Do people ever come back here? Meg Harper: You're having a panic attack, do you know what that means? Joe: It sounds pretty self-explanatory. Joe: You talkin' to me? Joe Scheffer: Did you have fun? Natalie Scheffer: Weekend from hell. They took me to another silly-ass hippie restaurant. Natalie Scheffer: With thee most absurd one-man play ever produced! Joe Scheffer: "Silly-ass"? Natalie Scheffer: Dad... Natalie Scheffer: [on the phone with Joe] Dad, just tell me something. Is it you don't wanna see me. Or is it you don't want me to see you? Joe: Yes...Yes to the second one. Natalie Scheffer: [crying] DAD, just please let me come over. Just for a little while.. Joe: It's okay. Everything's all right. I'm just sittin' here drowning my sorrows in a-- a quart of Ben and Jerrys Chunky Monkey. Chuck: Too bad. I was really hoping to give a shit. Joe: Can you show me some of that Crouching Dragon, Hidden Tiger stuff? Natalie Scheffer: Everything on the menu was made with curd. Curd this, curd that. I MEAN, I ordered a hamburger and I got a ten-minute lecture on animal rights from the waitress. AND the guy in the play was half naked! Joe: WHAT? Which half? Joe: Your become a farmer? Rick: No, Joe, I'm an actor dressed as a farmer...for an audition. Joe: Sorry. Callie: We had a great weekend. Did she tell you about the play? Joe: Yeah. The actors were naked. Natalie Scheffer: So were the ushers. Callie: They were not! Joe: Callie, Beauty and The Beast is in town. What's a matter with that? Natalie Scheffer: [gets out of the car after Joe gets punched by Mark]
LEAVE HIM ALONE, DIRTBAG!
Joe: Don't call anybody a dirtbag. Natalie Scheffer: Daddy, are you okay? You're bleeding. Joe: I'm good. I just tripped! I'm okay. Let's go.. Natalie Scheffer: Why do I have to spend weekends with them? Can't we just drive by every Saturday and wave? Joe Scheffer: Your mom's a little eccentric. Think of her as an exotic flower. Natalie Scheffer: And that made you what? Dirt? Joe Scheffer: NAT, she's your mom. Natalie Scheffer: HEY, that guy is an ass-wipe! Joe: NATALIE.. Natalie Scheffer: Sorry, I meant "ass-guy". Joe: That's Mark McKinney! He's a seven-year employee. W-what's he doing in the ten-year lot? Natalie Scheffer: Maybe he's gonna stand around for another three years. Joe: We gotta get you back to school. Natalie Scheffer: DAD, I really wanna talk about this! Natalie Scheffer: You know that big jerk took it easy on you, right? What makes you think he wont kill you this time? HUH? Natalie; DAD! Joe: You mad your point! Natalie Scheffer: GOOD. Natalie Scheffer: [watching Joe practice fighting] OH, my god. [turns of radio] Natalie Scheffer: WHAT ARE YOU, like 12? The guy's gonna hit you back. He's got ARMS! Joe: What are you doing her? Don't you have school? Natalie Scheffer: I needed to see you. Joe Scheffer: Excuse me I'm looking for Meg Harper, do you know where she is? Old Man: She's on the roof. Joe Scheffer: The roof? are you sure? Old Man: Son, she's a 31 year old woman and I'm a 72 year old man, I know where to find her.