Monk Jablonski: It's not the meaning of life, Alfred, it's the feeling of life. Al: Where am I going to sleep? Monk Jablonski: With that freshman. Imogen: You're the cutest one in New York! Imogen: Thank-you, cake is my world! Imogen: A little soul is necessary in life. Al: You make me feel alive. Al: I'm falling in love with you. Imogen: I love you. Cyrus: Don't you want to make me pancakes? No-one ever made me pancakes. Al: Cyrus, I'm in love with someone else. I can't make you anything. Imogen: [screaming at Al] You're an old man, and I hate that! And I hate you! Imogen: I have something to tell you... I slept with Jim last night. Al: Get the fuck out! Al: Yeah dad, she's perfect for me. Eddie Hicks: Don't mess with these guns!... Don't mess with 'em! Jim: So then I asked her to show me some of her paintings... they're so good. Al: She's a very talented lady. Jim: Yeah!... so goood! Al: You slept with a sixty year old? Eddie Hicks: Hey, when you work in the physical therapy industry - you make friends fast. Eddie Hicks: I'd sure like to fold her napkin. Al: You may be buff, but you look somewhat like a solid gold dancer. Imogen: That kiss belongs in a box, so I can show my grandkids one day. [Observing a young couple very much in love in a coffee shop] Al: I remember my first relationship, and it was something similar to theirs... except Imogen never wore that much jewelry... and I wouldn't be caught dead in those shoes. Al: I thought if I was immune to the shampoo, then I could get over her.
: [referring to a pregnancy test result] Wow, pink. That's like, good, right? Imogen: Post-collegiate life, half full or half empty? Al: Half empty. Imogen: I'd have to go with half empty too. Your greatest accomplishment since I last saw you? Al: Making friends with a spider. Imogen: Vices? Al: Shampoo. Imogen: That rumor was true? Al: I'll leave it open for interpretation. How about you? Imogen: This is supposed to be about you not about me. Al: It's been about you a little bit. Imogen: ...You. Al: Do you mean that? Imogen: Um... I have to go. [to Al] Monk Jablonski: Look at that park down there! Just think of how many loves lost and found, how many first kisses kissed, how many Frisbees lost and just remember that is your park my friend and you've got your whole life to walk though it. [to Al] Monk Jablonski: I'm not good with open wounds. You were always my Lancelot, I was just never your king.