"Dexter's Laboratory" 5.9

advertisement Dee Dee: Dexter, what's wrong? Dexter: I have no friends, and I am totally unpopular. Dee Dee: Duh. Dad: Dexter, I am your father. Dexter: [Gasp] That's not possible! Oh wait, no, you are right. Blue Falcon: Dyno-mutt has been dealt a devastating blow. Dexter: Sheesh, no kidding. Blue Falcon: I'm extremely wealthy. Dexter: Quickly, to the laboratory! [whenever his mother calls him] Dexter: What do you want, woman? Dexter: Dee Dee! I'm confused... Dee Dee: Good! [repeated line] Dee Dee: Oooh! What does THAT button do? Dexter: You are stupid! You are stupid! Oh, and don't forget, you are STUPID! [only words spoken in "DiM"] Dee Dee: You know they're all going to go out eventually. Dexter: I know... Mandark: Please, sir, call me... MANDARK! Mandark: Yes, Dexter, I can read your thoughts, and I am smarter than you. Mandark: Please, oh please, set me up on a date with that golden-haired angel who graces our undeserving school with her infinite beauty! Dexter's Concience #1: No way! You don't owe that jerk any favors! Dexter's Concience #2: That's right! He made you shut down your lab! Dexter's Concience #3: He's right! Dexter's Concience #4: Yeah! Dexter's Concience #5: And besides, Dee Dee is hyper and uncontrollable, and she might wreck Mandark's Labor... [Dexter and his conciences all develop an evil grin] Mandark: So, Dee Dee... I heard from a very reliable source that you... like... to... DANCE! Mandark: Thank you, dark forces, oh, THANK YOU! Mandark: Gather round, all you mortals, and behold the fury that you cannot deny! And you won't be disappointed, either. Mandark: Ooh, ah... Ooh... ooh, ah... I have to beat Dexter, sworn enemy. Have to destroy Dexter's lab. If only Ducky could! Ooh, ah! Mandark: My name is Mandark and I am Dexter's rival. He and I have been competing in science and other things for years and this race is just one more of those things where we try to beat each other, except I try to win by being sneaky and bad! My plan this time is to sabotage the Mark 5, so it doesn'twork as good as it should, then when Dexter is racing he'll most likely crash up, leaving room for me to win! Mandark: Excellent! My sneaky ways have put me in the lead! I'd give myself a pat on the back, but I'm driving, so I'll have to do it later! Mandark: Say no more, Dexter, oh ye of little mind. I'll save the day and take all the glory! Mandark: In your dreams, you freaky little gnome Mandark: What do I have to do to be cool? Mandark: By human standards, I know a lot. Mandark: All hail Mandark, the genius! All hail Mandark, the genius! Sing a song of Mandark, the greatest genius this world has ever known! Mandark: Blast you, Dexter! Now there's an idea... blast Dexter. Yes, blast Dexter! Mandark: Now open up, rampaging monster, and let the RAYS shine in! Mandark: This time has been duly noted and will be deducted from your salaries. Thank you! Mandark: You were almost late for work. Mandark: George, what do you say we cross the Delaware? Dee Dee: Dexter, wanna see my new dance? Dexter: No. Dee Dee: It's called "the fanciful unicorn". Dexter: Girl, I have seen better steps on a ladder. Dee Dee: Oh, yeah? Like you know any dances, Dexter. [Dexter turns on a boombox; techno music plays] Dexter: [doing the robot dance] Yes, it is called "the robot". Dee Dee: Word. Dee Dee: That is one rugged brother... Mee Mee/Lee Lee: Shut your mouth! Dee Dee: I'm only talkin' 'bout Dexter. Mee Mee/Lee Lee: We can dig it. Dee Dee: Sassy? What are your dreams? Sasquatch: WAH! Dee Dee: Uh, Dexter? Sorry to wake you... Dexter: You mean like you did the last 20 times? Dee Dee: Well, I went into your lab, see? And I pushed a button... Dexter: Oh, you mean like you did the last 20 MILLION times? Dexter: So what kind of stuff do you like? Girl: Oh, I like peace, quiet, and especially solitude! Dexter: We'll call you! Mandark: [eating cereal] Chew-chew-chew, chew-chew-chew-chew-chew Dexter: Omlette du fromage. Dexter: Dee Dee, how long have known each other? Our whole lives, you say? No, in truth? Never? Or should I say, you never knew me? Because if you did, you would know I am a soul who requires peace, quiet and, most importantly, solitude. But every day, that solitude is inevitably broken by *you*. [Dee Dee looks on nervously] Dexter: Which is why I called you here. Now, I know these are tough times and a dollar does not go as far as it used to, but it is time to take stock, a time for responsibility, a time for change, for as the lab grows, so do my expectations, which, quite frankly, you're not living up to, which is why I have made this tough but firm decision. Dee Dee, you're fired. Dee Dee: [screaming] *WHAT*! [She is yelling and ranting at Dexter, while he simply pushes a button and a robot kicks her out of the lab and his room and down the hall and into her room] Dee Dee: How dare you kick me out! I'm gonna report you! I'll have your badge! I'll show you! You haven't heard the last from *Dee Dee*! Dexter: [laughing] Dee Dee, I heard this great joke! Okay, here it goes: A physics professor and his assistant are working on liberating negatively-charged hydroxyl ions, when all of a sudden, the assistant says, "Wait, professor, what if the salicylic acids do not accept the hydroxyl ions?" And the professor responds, "That's no hydroxyl ion; that's my wife!" [He breaks into hysterical laughter, while Dee Dee is unimpressed] Dexter: You fool! Mothers do not get sick; they take care of the sickly!