advertisement Frankie Dean: My Craig could sell sand to the desert. Rebecca 'Becca' Hayton: [about Justin] He kissed me in the middle of the classroom Ben Davies: Blimey, he's got some bottle for a 16-year-old, ain't he? Rebecca 'Becca' Hayton: He's 15... Max Cunningham: Simple but brilliant... just like OB. Lee Hunter: Oh, come on. OB could flog g-strings to nuns. Dannii Carbone: [about Zara] That girl could start an argument in an empty room! Richard Taylor: [shouts] Timber! [bits of wall crash down the stairs] Justin Burton: [about Becca] She thinks I'm too young. Ali Taylor: She's not wrong there. Darlene Taylor: [about Justin] You do have your uses, don't you? Craig Dean: [to Jack] Chill out, Daddy-o! Frankie Dean: [about a lavendar pillow] I've heard it's good for flatulence. Ali Taylor: What sort of film is this? Justin Burton: It's porn...! Craig Dean: Richard Branson didn't build up his fleets by helping his mum set the video... Jack Osborne: Craig Dean, you could sell snow to the Eskimos. Tony Hutchinson: [about Ali and Darlene] You're not surely suggesting we indulge them, are you? Mandy Richardson Hutchinson: Well, you should have thought of that before getting your kit off, shouldn't you? Lee Hunter: Do you really think going with all of Dan's mates will bring him back? Lisa Hunter: Thanks, Lee. Now I know how you really feel. Steph Dean: What did I get back? Nothing! Frankie Dean: I know, love. But your arm looks good... Lisa Hunter: I want you to get to know my family better. Ben Davies: I already know them! Lisa Hunter: Yeah, well, it's different now. Jack Osborne: If she's old enough to be in college then I'm Miss World. Sam 'OB' O'Brien: Then put your bikini on, Jack, 'cause she's doing media studies. Stacey: I'll see if I can get you a job at the salon. Lee Hunter: Thank you, I could kiss you right now! Stacey: Most men could - I'm gorgeous! Stacey: Can you make me one of those coffees? Bella Manning: Would that be with or without arsenic? Stacey: Oh, I don't mind as long as it's frothy! Steph Dean: [at Cameron's audition for a band] Cam can sing. Declan: I sing. Steph Dean: Yeah, well you might want a night off! Declan: Name me one band with two singers. Steph Dean: The Beatles. Declan: Apart from The Beatles. Steph Dean: Oasis. Oh, and Abba! Declan: Do we look like Abba? Steph Dean: Well, you could grow your beard a bit longer. Liz Burton Taylor: [screaming] Get off him! Why are you hitting my son? Jacob 'Jake' Dean: [to Becca, who is crying] Tell them what you've done! [silence] Jacob 'Jake' Dean: She's been having an affair. The lying bitch has been having an affair! Frankie Dean: With who? Darren Osborne: Word of advice, Frankie, never apply to be on Mastermind. Quiz Master: Who's the only gay in the village? Tony Hutchinson: Dominic Drag Queen: [During the trivia quiz at Gay Night at the SU bar] Who is "the only gay in the village"? Tony Hutchinson: Dominic! I mean Daffyd! Dominic Reilly: I'm not gay, I'm a virgin! Drag Queen: Ooh darling, I hope you're saving yourself for me! Sam 'OB' O'Brien: [after he opens the freezer at Il Gnosh, which Dom & Tina are trapped in] Oh, sorry mate, I didn't mean to interrupt anything... Dominic Reilly: [embarrassed] Tina was just admiring my profiterole tower. Sam 'OB' O'Brien: Is that what you call it?