[about her probation cases] Julie: I only handle young, single women. Coogan: [moving closer] Yeah. Me too. Julie: Let me consult my files. I only handle young single girls. Coogan: Yeah... me too! Mrs. Ellen Ringerman: [angry] Who do you think you are? Stupid-looking Texan coming in here with your fancy cowboy get-up, fancy boots, fancy hat... do you know what you are? Coogan: Fancy! Det. Lt. McElroy, NYPD: My regards to Texa... um... Arizona. [Coogan is taking a bath, a busty woman is washing him, Coogan throws the soap, aiming for her cleavage, and misses] Woman: Need a bigger target? Coogan: There ain't any in this county. Taxi driver: That's $2.95, including the luggage. Coogan: Tell me, how may stores are there named Bloomingdales in this town? Taxi driver: One, why? Coogan: We passed it twice. Taxi driver: It's still $2.95, including the luggage. Coogan: Yeah, well there's $3.00, including the tip. Coogan: You learn about a person when you hunt 'em. Det. Lt. McElroy, NYPD: Like what? Coogan: Like that he's not a fool, that's what. Sgt. Wallace: Then how in the hell did you collar him? Coogan: [panting] I'm making a citizen's arrest.