Dennis Miller: We need a return to the basics in this country when you stop to think that only one of the three "R's" actually starts with the letter "r" Dennis Miller: What if all those crop circles are just huge ads for Target? Dennis Miller:
We are simultaneously the most hated, loved, feared and admired nation on this planet. In short, we are Frank Sinatra.
Dennis Miller: Ever wonder if the crop circles were just ads for Target? [on taxes] Dennis Miller: I'm sick and tired of the left telling me what a fuck-up I am, and then in the same breath demanding 48% of my fucked-upedness. How's about the courtesy of a reach-around, guys? [on Sean Penn's visit to Iraq] Dennis Miller: If only Saddam Hussein were a Paparazzi. Dennis Miller: I come from that earlier time in America when palm pilot was a nickname you recieved upon entering puberty! I was more than a palm pilot I was the palm Chuck Jager. Tom Wolfe wrote a book about me called "The Right Hand Stuff". I was the only guy in my class hip enough to move to the European grip. Dennis Miller: I was wondering if Circuit City could possibly make their receipts just a little bit longer. Dennis Miller: Do you know what Barbra Streisand's problem is? She thinks she's Barbra Streisand! Dennis Miller: [On Yoda in the latest Star Wars film] He came out that corner with that light-sword like he had the only lighter in a crackhouse. Dennis Miller: Growing up, my family wasn't very tight. We were more like a tour group with secrets...