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"What's New, Scooby-Doo?"
(2002)
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Velma Dinkley:
[Velma just got a makeover from the makeover machine of the future] I feel like I got 10 pounds of make-up on, these shoes are too tight and?
[sees herself in the mirror - she is in a tank top, tight pants, high heals, is without her glasses and has her hair done really nice]
Velma Dinkley:
?Wow, I'm hot!
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
Du jour, du jour, du jour. I'm learning to talk French.
Velma Dinkley:
Badly.
Daphne:
Maybe you should start by just going "Oui, oui."
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
I did that before we left the hotel.
Daphne:
[disguised as her cousin] I hope this works. The family resemblance is uncanny.
Velma Dinkley:
So you look like Danica?
Daphne:
Yes, but, so does Uncle Julius when *he's* in heels.
Nancy Chang:
And how will these high profile games be affected by the loss of Olympic Bronze Medalist, Chris Klug, under mysterious circumstances?
Bruce Wilkenson:
Nancy, I'm sure with a million dollars at stake the other competitors will be hungry for victory.
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
Chris Klug injured?
Velma Dinkley:
Mysterious circumstances?
Daphne:
One million *dollars*.
Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers:
Hungry?
Daphne:
Wow, these people sure know how to throw a dinner.
Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers:
That's good, cause I sure know how to catch one.
Daphne:
Eww!
Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers:
What?
Daphne:
You're tracking in that gunk.
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
Isn't that proof there's a real dinosaur?
Daphne:
No. Wait just a minute. This stuff is bat guano. It's the basis of many cosmetics.
Velma Dinkley:
Another good reason to keep my natural look.
Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers:
Like, we're staying here? No way. No *way*.
Velma Dinkley:
Okay. You and Scooby can stay out here - *next* to the graveyard.
Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers:
Well, since either choice is like Creepsville I'll choose the one that might have a kitchen.
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Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers
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ff5
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:
Hey check it out. Andy and Mandy make dandy candy.
[laughs]
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
That's handy.
Nancy Chang:
Rufus Raucous, the magician the world watched perish on this very site, will return tonight; seemingly from the dead. Is this for real? I don't know. But I *do* know, I reported it first.
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
Hanging our things from vines. Great idea Daphne.
Daphne:
Something I remembered from Bonfire Girls. Keeps everything safe from mud, moisture and soldier ants.
Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers:
Not to mention lions, leopards and snakes.
Scoobert 'Scooby' Doo:
Oh my.
Daphne:
Did you see the sea monster? It was huge and green and ugly all over.
Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers:
Sounds like that salad we had on the airplane.
Velma Dinkley:
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Daphne:
That Maura's hairstyle is all wrong for her face?
Velma Dinkley:
That too but no.
[the Gang splits up to look for clues but in a new pairing]
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
So, uh, did you see the game last night?
Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers:
Uh, I'm not really into sports.
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
Oh, heh, yeah right.
Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers:
You wanna get some food?
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
No thanks, I'm not hungry.
Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers:
Oookay.
[both sigh]
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
Next time we pair up like usual.
Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers:
Good plan.
Velma Dinkley:
Wow. I thought you just collected toys.
Harry Noze:
No. I am also a most excellent toy maker. Check this out. I call her Crying Carrie.
Daphne:
Why do you call her -
[the doll shrieks painfully]
Velma Dinkley:
Never thought I'd see Scooby-Doo jump the shark.
Emperor Caesar Saladicus:
Those who are about to fight, salute me! I am the Emperor Caesar Saladicus. Do you have any last requests?
Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers:
Hold the anchovies?
Daphne:
Great idea to rent these mopeds Freddy.
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
I'll never forget that guy's face when I said I wanted something that could outrace a chariot.
Velma Dinkley:
That's because your Italian meant "outrace a flying hamster".
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
Okay, here's the plan. Shaggy, you and Scooby create a diversion.
Norville 'Shaggy' Rogers:
Right.
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
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Daphne, you and Velma will jump over to the other side of the roof and get to that control panel.
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c71
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Velma Dinkley, Daphne:
Check.
Baseball Specter:
What about me?
Fred 'Freddy' Jones:
Well, you're gonna make your way over to the -
[Fred gasps then the Gang screams and runs away]
Daphne:
Don't you just love Valentine's Day?
Velma Dinkley:
Which part, the rampant commercialism or the pressure to identify oneself in the context of a socially acceptable couple?
Daphne:
Both.
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