Jack and Victor have broken out of Chewin' The Fat and now have their own six part series on BBC One Scotland. These Glaswegian patter merch...更多>
[Jack and Victor enter The Clansman] Bobby: Hey look! It's Lambert and Butler! Jack: Shut it Bobby, you're the only fag in here. [Victor is clearing out Jack's fridge when he comes across a dated looking can of Tennants Lager] Victor: Jeezo Jack, there's a lassie on this tin, it'll be well past it's sell-by. Jack: Ahh right, mind you, they never put sell-by dates on the cans back then, so it should be ok. Victor: Consider this, you're warm noo, but how's it gonnae be in a wee stony jail cell, with nothing to heat ye up... but a hot boabie RIGHT up your arse! [Jack and Victor enter The Clansman] Bobby the barman: Oh, Here comes Francie and Josie Jack, Victor: Shut up Dick! Bobby the barman: For the Millionth time, it's Bobby. [Jack and Victor enter The Clansman] Bobby the barman: Oh, look who it isnae. Jack: Oh, that is fantastic patter, Bobby, who are we no today, ya prick? Victor: Two lagers, ya fanny. [Jack and Victor enter The Clansman] Bobby the barman: Oh, here they come. Abbott and Costello. You're putting the beef on Jack. Jack: Aye, that right. Everytime i shag your wife, she makes me a sandwich. Isa Drennan: I wis just sayin tae Jack and Victor, it'd be handy tae hae a key fur Wullie MacIntosh's hoose. Winston Ingram: I hae a key [gets whacked by Victor] Winston Ingram: ... fur mah door. It's handy 'cause if I didnae hae wan, I'd huf tae climb in through the windae. Bobby the barman: [Jack and Victor enter the Clansman] Ho-ho, it's the two Ronnies. Victor: The two Ronnies is it, aye? Well, then, it's shut-up-ya-prick frae me... Jack: And its shut-up-ya-prick frae him. Bobby the barman: [Jack and Victor enter the pub] Oh, here they come, Batman and Robin! Victor: We'll accept that, so long as you go catwoman, you big pussy!