继三部世俗题材影片《疯狂店员》、《耍酷一族》和《猜·情·寻》之后,凯文·史密斯向全新领域发起挑战。在梦幻般的背景下,凡人遭遇了一伙天上来客,目睹了他们的生活、责任和火爆脾气。当然,史密斯招牌式的激烈冲突和异域冒险及特效是不可或缺的。   早在动笔创作长片处女作《疯狂店员》之前,史密斯就完成了《怒犯天条》的剧本。他说:“故事的最初灵感源自我对自己的信仰提出的置疑,我百思不得其解,这本身就令人发笑。显而易见,我一直在拍摄关系电影,这部电影也不例外,它有关与上帝的关系,是一部奇幻闹剧。”   史密斯之所以将影片酝酿多年,是因为他认为自己当时还不够成熟,急于求成会适得其反,现在才是筹拍本片的最佳时机。当史密斯的制片搭档斯科特·莫西尔(Scott Mosier)看到《怒犯天条》的剧本时,立即被史密斯天马行空般的构思吸引了,他说:“这个剧本与众不同而且充满新意,极具趣味和各种各样的疑问,还能看到史密斯电影所有引人入胜的元素。”   为了将自己的奇思怪想搬上大银幕,凯文·史密斯找到了制作设计师罗伯特·霍兹曼(Robert Holtzman)。在后者看来,史密斯的剧本就像一本图画小说,他将本片看作是呈现在大银幕上的漫画书。于是,在这种思想的指引下,霍兹曼开始在大量漫画书中寻找颜色和设计构思的灵感。他在画面背景中使用了很多墙壁,以 花絮 影片全片在匹兹堡拍摄。 起初,片中的上帝一角是为霍利·亨特所写,虽然她没能出演本片,但剧本中仍提到了《钢琴别恋》。 艾伯特·布鲁克斯曾是扮演格里克主教的人选。 乔伊·劳伦·亚当斯曾是扮演巴莎妮的人选。 艾玛·汤普森曾是扮演上帝的原定人选,后来在开拍前,她因怀孕而退出。 片中的洛基是为杰森·李所写,但由于片约冲突,他只好选择扮演死神,马特·达蒙取而代之。 女歌手艾拉妮丝·莫莉塞特(Alanis Morissette)曾希望扮演巴莎妮,但由于世界巡回演唱会而无法如愿,当她的演出计划完成之后,巴莎妮的演员已经敲定,于是她只好扮演上帝。 影片剧本共有8个版本,但没有一个版本写有上帝扫街的结尾。导演凯文·史密斯在最后时刻灵机一动,因为拍摄计划出现延误,而教堂最终要求史密斯将街道清理干净,于是史密斯在清扫街道时,将上帝加了进去。 在片头的机场场景中,格温妮斯·帕特洛就坐在本·阿弗莱克不远处,她在片中一闪即逝,因为当时她应阿弗莱克的邀请造访了片场。 据凯文·史密斯称,吉莲·安德森是扮演巴莎妮的首选。 影片制作设计师罗伯特·霍兹曼在片中扮演了一名警察。 比尔·默瑞和亚当·桑德勒都曾为扮演死神的人选。 鲍勃在片中只说了三句话。 凯文·史密斯曾希望由罗伯特·罗德里格兹执导本片。 片中火车的外景画面出自1990年的《惊劫梨花》。 凯文·史密斯在DVD花絮中称,与琳达·费奥伦蒂诺很难相处,她甚至不愿和他说话。 莎南·多尔蒂(Shannen Doherty)曾希望扮演巴莎妮。 在排演之前,杰森·缪斯就将整个剧本都背了下来,当被问及原因时,他说他不想惹怒阿伦·瑞克曼。
...详情

经典台词

  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Yo man, tell me something about me. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You masturbate more than anyone on the planet. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Aw fuck, everyone knows that. Tell me something nobody knows. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • When you do it, you're thinking about guys. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [a shocked Silent Bob stares at Jay] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Dude, not all the time. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Ladies and gentlemen, you have been judged guilty of sinning against our almighty God, and I promise you, you shall pay for your trespasses, in blood! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [He rips open his shirt to reveal a silver breastplate] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Wings, now. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I'm feeling a little exposed here... 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • DO IT! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I know they were just kids, but we kicked their pube-less asses! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • "I do believe in this." What does that mean? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Get me a... Holy Bartender. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartender: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Never heard of it. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Ahh, he doesn't know how to make a Holy Bartender. You do, don't you, Muse? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Don't... 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Ahh, anybody? No? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Jay and Silent Bob shake their heads] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Well, I know how to make a Holy Bartender... 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Azrael pulls out an uzi, shoots the bartender repeatedly, then laughs hysterically] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Get it? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [restrained by the Stygian triplets who have suddenly appeared] Sweet Jesus, Azrael why? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Come on, demon, I wanna see you try that shit on someone who's already dead! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Now, now, apostle, you maintain that kind of an attitude and you and the barkeep won't be the only corpses in the room. The Christ bitch will join you. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [referring to Bethany] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Anyone who isn't dead or from another plane of existence would do well to cover their ears right about now. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Wax on, wax off. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I am to charge you with a holy crusade. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • For the record, I work in an abortion clinic. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • 27 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • dbc 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • : 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Noah was a drunk. Look what he accomplished. And no one's even asking you to build an ark. All you have to do is go to New Jersey, and visit a small church on a very important day. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • New Jersey? That doesn't sound like much of a crusade. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Aside from the fine print, that's it. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What's the fine print? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [mumbling into glass] Stopacoupleofangelsfromenteringandthusnegatingallexistence. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Wait, wait, wait. Repeat that. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Stop a couple of angels from entering and thus negating all existence. I hate when people need it spelled out for them. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What the shit is that? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • He still digs humanity, but it bothers Him to see the shit that gets carried out in His name - wars, bigotry, televangelism. But especially the factioning of all the religions. He said humanity took a good idea and, like always, built a belief structure on it. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Having beliefs isn't good? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I think it's better to have ideas. You can change an idea. Changing a belief is trickier. Life should malleable and progressive; working from idea to idea permits that. Beliefs anchor you to certain points and limit growth; new ideas can't generate. Life becomes stagnant. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Gun Salesman: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • We call this piece the Fecalator. One look at it and the target shits him or herself. Try it on. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Well, it's a lot more compact than the flaming sword, but it's not nearly as impressive. Just doesn't have that Wrath-of-the-Almighty edge to it. I mean, come on, how am I supposed to strike fear into the hearts of the wicked with this thing? Look at this... 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Well, then, you know, don't use a gun. Just lay the place to waste, like. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Easy for you to say. You get off light in razing. You got to stand there and read at Sodom and Gomorrah, I had to do all the work. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What work did you do? You lit a few fires. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I rained down sulphur, man, there's a subtle difference. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Oh, yeah, I'm sure. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Hey, you know, fuck you, man. Any moron with a pack of matches can set a fire. Raining down sulphur is like an endurance trial man. Mass genocide is the most exhausting activity one can engage in, outside of soccer. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • McHenry is pretty far from Jersey, might I ask what brings you guys to Illinois? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Some fuck named John Hughes. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • "16 Candles" John Hughes? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • 329 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You know him too? That fucking guy. Made this flick "16 Candles" right? Not bad it's got tits in it, but no bush. Of course Ebert over here don't give a shit about that stuff cause he's all in love with this John Hughes guy and rents every one of his movies. Fucking "Breakfast Club" all these stupid kids actually show up to detention, fucking "Weird Science" where this one chick wants to take off her gear and get down, but aw, no she don't cause it's a PG movie, and then there's "Pretty In Pink" which I can't watch with this tubby muthafucker any more, because everytime we get to the part where the red head hooks up with her dream guy, he starts sobbin' like a little eight-year-old with a skinned knee and shit. And nothing is worse then watching a fat man weep. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • fcb 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Heh, me lead you? Lady look at me, I don't even know where the hell I am half the time! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Noman the Golgothan: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Not born. SHIT into existence. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Nun: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You don't believe in God because of Alice in Wonderland? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • No, "Through the Looking Glass". That poem, "The Walrus and the Carpenter" that's an indictment of organized religion. The walrus, with his girth and his good nature, he obviously represents either Buddha, or... or with his tusk, the Hindu elephant god, Lord Ganesha. That takes care of your Eastern religions. Now the carpenter, which is an obvious reference to Jesus Christ, who was raised a carpenter's son, he represents the Western religions. Now in the poem, what do they do... what do they do? They... They dupe all these oysters into following them and then proceed to shuck and devour the helpless creatures en masse. I don't know what that says to you, but to me it says that following these faiths based on mythological figures ensure the destruction of one's inner-being. Organized religion destroys who we are by inhibiting our actions... by inhibiting our decisions, out of... out of fear of some... some intangible parent figure who... who shakes a finger at us from thousands of years ago and says... and says, "Do it - Do it and I'll fuckin' spank you. " 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Are you saying you believe? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • No. But I have a good idea. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Get offa me. I wanna see what's up. What the fuck is this shit? Who the fuck are you, lady? Why the fuck did you hug my head? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Quite a little mouth on him, isn't there? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What the fuck is this, The Piano? Why ain't this broad talking? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I believe the answers that you seek lie within my companion's eyes. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What the fuck does that mean? Has everyone gone fuckin' nuts? What the fuck happened to that guy's head? I want some... 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [God kisses him on the cheek. Jay faints] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Silent Bob hits Azrael in the chest with a blessed golf-club - his chest shatters, revealing black ooze] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • But I'm a fuckin' demon. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What's he like? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • God? Lonely. But funny. He's got a great sense of humor. Take sex for example. There's nothing funnier than the ridiculous faces you people make mid-coitus. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Sex is a joke in heaven? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • The way I understand it, it's mostly a joke down here, too. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • However, if you should decide to stop being selfish and accept your responsibility, you won't be alone. You'll have support. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What, more angels? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Prophets. Two of them. The one who speaks - and he will, at great lengths, whether you want him to or not - will make mention of himself as a prophet. The other one... well, he's the quiet type, but he'll be helpful just the same. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • 57 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Then - I don't mean to sound ungrateful - but what are you doing hanging around? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • fed 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • We're here to pick up chicks. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Excuse me? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • We figure an abortion clinic is a good place to meet loose women. Why else would they be there unless they like to fuck? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What exactly brought you to Illinois? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Some fuck named John Hughes. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • "Sixteen Candles" John Hughes? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You know that guy, too? See, all these movies take place in a small town called Shermer, in Illinois, where all the honies are top-shelf, but all the dudes are whiny pussies - except for Judd Nelson, he was fuckin' harsh - but best of all, there was no one dealin', man; then, it hits me: we could live like phat rats if we were the blunt connection in Shermer, Illinois. So we collected some money we were owed, and we caught a bus. You know what the fuck we found out when we got there? There is no Shermer in Illinois. Movies are fuckin' bullshit. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I feel like I'm Han Solo, and you're Chewie, and she's Ben Kenobi, and we're in that fucked-up bar. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You know what the dead do with most of their time? They watch the living. Especially in the shower. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I can't wait to die. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Can you believe it? Me - a muse, for God's sake. I sit down in front of the typewriter, and what do I get? Nothing. Blank page. I can't even write a grocery list. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What about what you did with Jay and Silent Bob? You inspired them. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • That's the cosmic joke. I can give out a zillion and nine ideas a second, but I can't keep any for myself. Her quirky sense of humor. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [after throwing Bartleby and Loki off a train; a la Indiana Jones] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Silent Bob: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • No ticket. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You people. If there isn't a movie about it, it's not worth knowing, is it? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Human beings have neither the aural nor the psychological capacity to withstand the awesome power of God's true voice. Were you to hear it, your mind would cave in and your heart would explode within your chest. We went through five Adams before we figured that one out. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • The last four days on Earth. If I had a dick, I'd go get laid. But we can do that next best thing. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What's that? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Let's kill people. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Lady next to Loki spits out her coffee] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [to lady] Oh, not you. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I have issues with anyone who treats faith as a burden instead of a blessing. You people don't celebrate your faith; you mourn it. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • The whole fucking world's against us, dude, I swear to God. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Bethany decides to accompany Jay and Silent Bob to New Jersey] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I want to go with you. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • 22 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • ffb 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • : 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What, steady?... OK, but Silent Bob has to live with us and you pay the rent. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Jay drives Bethany's car; the motor shrieks] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What gear are you in? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • "Gear"? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Behold the Metatron, herald of the Almighty and voice of the one true God. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Bethany sprays him with fire extinguisher] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [coughing] Fuck! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [emerging from smoke] Sweet Jesus! Do you have to use the whole can? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Who the FUCK are you, and what the FUCK are you doing in my room? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I'm soaked and she's surly, that's rich! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • When are you people going to learn? It's not about who's right or wrong. No denomination's nailed it yet, and they never will because they're all too self-righteous to realize that it doesn't matter what you have faith in, just that you have faith. Your hearts are in the right place, but your brains need to wake up. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [about Christ] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What He really hates is the shit that gets carried out in his name. Wars. Bigotry. Televangelism. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Church laws are fallible because they're created by man. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You know, here's what I don't get about you. You know for a fact that there is a God. You have been in his presence. He's spoken to you personally, and yet I just heard you claim to be an atheist. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I just like to fuck with the clergy, man. I just love it. I just love to keep those guys on their toes. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You know, maybe you're wrong about this slaughter thing. How can you even be sure what incurs the Lord's wrath these days? Times change. I remember when eating meat on a Friday was supposed to be a Hell-worthy trespass. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • The major sins never change. Besides, you know, I can spot a commandment-breaker from, like, a mile away. So, bet on it. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • This from the guy who still owes me 10 bucks over that bet about what was gonna be the bigger movie - "E. T. " or "Krush Groove"? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You know, fuck you, man, 'cause time's gonna tell on that one. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [brief pause] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What, are you insinuating that I don't have what it takes anymore? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Insinuating, no. Flat-out telling you. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Leave it to the Catholics to destroy existence. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You were martyred? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • That's one way of putting it. Another way of putting it would be to say that I was bludgeoned to death by huge fucking rocks. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • So what's up? You got a friend for Silent Bob, or are you just gonna do us both? If so, I'm first. I hate sloppy seconds. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You're a man of principle. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Tell a person that you're the Metatron and they stare at you blankly. Mention something out of a Charlton Heston movie and suddenly everybody is a theology scholar. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You knew Jesus? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Knew him? Shit... Nigga owes me twelve bucks. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Wait a minute. Christ. You know Christ? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Knew him? Shit, nigga owes me 12 bucks! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Never let it be said that your anal-retentive attention to detail never yielded positive results. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You can't be anal-retentive if you don't have an anus. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Outstanding work. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Bethany and Rufus find Jay and Silent Bob at a strip club] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What are you doing? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Proving to this bastard I ain't gay. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Long story, forget it. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [about Azrael's neutrality in the Holy Conflict] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What are you, some kind of fucking chicken? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • No, I was an ARTIST, STUPID! I WAS INSPIRATION! A muse has no place in battle! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • So after the fallen were banished to hell, God turned on those who wouldn't fight, and Azrael was sent down with the demons. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [mockingly] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Something he considers a GRAVE injustice! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Ah, come on! Don't tell me you NEVER questioned the judgement, Serendipity. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • No. It never bothered me. So you were an artist! Big deal! Elvis was an artist. But that didn't stop him from joining the service in time of war. And that's why he's The King, and you're a schmuck. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Standing beside Bethany's car, its engine burned out] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Like I ever drove before... 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You are the great great great GREAT great grand-niece of Jesus Christ. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • So that would make Bethany... part black? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I don't want this, it's too big. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • That's what Jesus said. Yes, I had to tell him. And you can imagine how that hurt the Father - not to be able to tell the Son Himself because one word from His lips would destroy the boy's frail human form? So I was forced to deliver the news to a scared child who wanted nothing more than to play with other children. I had to tell this little boy that He was God's only Son, and that it meant a life of persecution and eventual crucifixion at the hands of the very people He came to enlighten and redeem. He begged me to take it back, as if I could. He begged me to make it all not true. And I'll let you in on something, Bethany, this is something I've never told anyone before... If I had the power, I would have. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Liz: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • 109 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • He said that faith is like a glass of water. When you're young, the glass is small, and it's easy to fill up. But the older you get, the bigger the glass gets, and the same amount of liquid doesn't fill it anymore. Periodically, the glass has to be refilled. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • fef 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You're suggesting I need to get filled? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Liz: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • In more ways than one. You need to get laid, Bethany Sloane. You need a man, if only for ten minutes. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • It's been my experience that the average male is never a man. Not even for ten minutes in his entire lifespan. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Liz: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • That'a a bit militant. You thinking of joining the other side? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Couldn't do it. Women are insane. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Liz: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Then YOU need to go back to church and ask God for a third option. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I think that God is dead. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Liz: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • The sign of a true Catholic. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I think God is dead. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Liz: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • The sign of a true Catholic. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [while Loki is laying waste to the Mooby board room, Bartelby is sitting in the lounge reading "Mooby Magazine"] I cant believe we forgot about the magazine. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [to the female Mooby employee after shooting the board members] Gum? Oh these guys, these men were evil. You're a pure soul. You have nothing to worry about. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [holds his gun up] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • But you did not say "God bless you" when I sneezed. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [yelling off camera] LOKI! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You're getting off light! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [after he and Silent Bob join a gang and the Golgothan poop monster is heading towards them] Smoke that motherfucker like it aint no thang! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany, you of anyone should know that tits dont make a woman. As you can tell, I lack definition. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [off the screen] Hey! They're getting a free show! Let me see that shit! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Angels have no genitalia] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • See? I'm as anatomically impaired as a Ken doll. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron acts as the voice of God. Any documented occasion when some yahoo claims God has spoken to them, they're speaking to me. Or they're talking to themselves. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • So once he's done with the firstborn, Loki takes his friend Bartleby out for a post-slaughter drink. And over many rounds, they get into this discussion about whether or not murder in the name of God is okay. Now, Bartleby can run circles around Loki intellectually, not to mention that Loki's already half in the bag. And in the end, Bartleby convinces Loki to quit his position and take a lesser one that doesn't involve slaughter. So - very inebriated - Loki tells God he quits, throws down his fiery sword, and gives Him the finger. Which ruins it for the rest of us, because from that day forward, God decreed that all angels could no longer imbibe alcohol. Hence all the spitting. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Were they sent to Hell? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Worse. Wisconsin. For the entire span of human history. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • 26 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • ffb 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • : 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I don't know what to say... or think... except... 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • That you offer us sex as a reward. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • All right, but let's say we're caught in a situation where we've got like five minutes to live, like a bomb or something is gonna go off. Would you fuck us then? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • In that highly unlikely situation? Yeah, sure. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • She's a slut. Bunnnng. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I can spot a commandment-breaker a mile away. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • She's fucking pissed, dude. She'll never fuck us now. Well, maybe you, but definitely not me. Let me know how she is. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany Sloane: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • NOBODY IS FUCKING ME! YOU GOT THAT! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Guys like us just don't fall out of the fucking sky, you know. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Rufus falls out of the sky] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Beautiful, naked, big-titted women just don't fall out of the sky, you know. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Hey! What I just did gave me a fucking migraine! So if you don't pipe down, I'm going to yank your sack off like a paper towel. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • White folks only want to hear the good shit: life eternal, a place in God's Heaven. But as soon as they hear they're getting this good shit from a black Jesus, they freak. And that, my friends, is called hypocrisy. A black man can steal your stereo, but he can't be your Savior. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • In the three years I followed His ass around Jerusalem, did I ever get laid? Hell no. And I was in my prime. I could've been knee-deep in shepherd's daughters, not to mention fine-ass Mary Magdalene. She had a thing for dark meat, if you follow me. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Do you know what makes a human being decent? Fear. And therein lies the problem. None of you has anything left to fear anymore. You rest comfortably in seats of inscrutable power, hiding behind your false idol, far from judgment, lives shrouded in secrecy even from one another. But not from God. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I'm responsible for nineteen of the twenty top-grossing films of all time. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Nineteen? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Yeah, the one about the kid, by himself in his house, burglars trying to get in and he fights them off? I had nothing to do with that one. Somebody sold their soul to Satan to get the grosses up on that piece of shit. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Read the Bible again sometime. Women are painted as bigger antagonists than the Egyptians and Romans combined. It stinks. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Your hard-on for smiting has prevented us from negotiating what should be the relatively simple matter of catching or staying on a bus. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [On Christ] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • He likes to listen to people talk. Says it sounds like music to Him. Christ loved to sit around the fire and listen to me and the other guys. Whenever we were going on about unimportant shit, He always had a smile on His face. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • ff8 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You're saying that having beliefs is a bad thing? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I think it's better to have ideas. You can change an idea. Changing a belief is trickier. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [On Christ] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • The Man loved being human. Probably why He was so good at it. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • The humans have besmirched everything bestowed on them. They were given Paradise, they threw it away. They were given this planet, they destroyed it. They were favored best among all His endeavors, and some of them don't even believe He exists. And in spite of it all, He's shown them infinite fucking patience at every turn. What about us? I asked you... once to lay down the sword because I felt sorry for them. What was the result? Our expulsion from Paradise. WHERE WAS HIS INFINITE FUCKING PATIENCE THEN? IT'S NOT RIGHT, IT'S NOT FAIR. We've paid our debt. Don't you think it's time? Don't you think its time we went home? and to do that, I think we have to dispatch of our would-be dispatchers. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jesus didn't have any brothers or sisters. Mary was a virgin. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Mary gave birth to CHRIST without having known a man's touch, that's true. But she did have a husband. And do you really think he'd have stayed married to her all those years if he wasn't getting laid? The nature of God and the Virgin Mary, those are leaps of faith. But to believe a married couple never got down? Well, that's just plain gullibility. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You are Bethany Sloane. Nobody can take that away from you, not even God. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You know those constitutionals He likes to take? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany Sloane: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Constitutionals? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I think we're beyond euphemisms at this point: God's a Skee-Ball fanatic. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • So what do we do now? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Well, I say we get drunk, because I'm all out of ideas. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Good Lord, the little stoner's got a point. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Cardinal Glick: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Fill them pews, people, that's the key. Grab the little ones as well. Hook 'em while they're young. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Kind of like the tobacco industry? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Cardinal Glick: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Christ, if only we had their numbers. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • We were sent by Him who is called I Am! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Cardinal Glick: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Cute. Really cute. Now come on, kids, playtime with the Cardinal is over. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Worked for Moses. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I'm telling you, man, this ceremony is a big mistake. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Cardinal Glick: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • The Catholic Church does not make mistakes. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Please. What about the Church's silent consent to the slave trade? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • And its platform of noninvolvement during the Holocaust? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Cardinal Glick: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • All right, mistakes were made. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • How? That's the only thing I couldn't figure out. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • 25 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • ffb 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • : 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Oh no, I've seen way too many Bond movies to know that you never reveal all the details of your plan, no matter how close you may think you are to winning. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Bartleby and Loki slaughter parishioners outside a church] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You're looking at eons of repression getting purged. If only they'd let us jerk off. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Now if I remember my protocol correctly, the powers will attempt to contact the Last Scion - which leaves us no other recourse than to eliminate her before she enters the fray. I need you three to shuffle her loose the mortal coil, so that we may obtain our final glory. Are we all on the same page? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Silent Bob kills Azrael with Cardinal Glick's golf club] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Glick's the kind of asshole that would bless his own clubs for a better game. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Stall Bartleby from going into that church. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • How the hell am I supposed to do that? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Think of something. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I already did, but it takes two of us. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [after meeting God] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You want to hear something sick? I got half a stock when she kissed me. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [last lines] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [after the cast and crew credits] So... does that mean Bethany's... part black? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Quit killing people, that's high profile. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Oh, lighten up. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • No pleasure, no rapture, no exquisite sin greater... than central air. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What are you? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I'm pissed off is what I am! Do you go around drenching everyone who comes into your room with flame-retardant chemicals? No wonder you're single. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jesus wasn't white, Jesus was black. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Well then why did he get written about and you didn't? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Well, he IS the son of God. Kinda hard to have a New Testament without him. So you fudge a few facts, put a spin on his ethnicity. Leavin' me out's okay because you still got twelve white boys to choose from. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Are you buying any of this shit? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • So do you do anal? Is it true that chicks fart if you blast 'em in the ass? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [to the Stygian triplets] Go back to your paper routes, you Mighty Duck fucks. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Dude, I know they were just kids, but we kicked their fucking pube-less asses. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Smoke that motherfucker like it ain't no thang. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [to Bethany] The man was right about you. And I am going to go home and tell him so. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [to Jay And Silent Bob] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • And if you clean up your language, I JUST might put in a good word for you too. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Silent Bob: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Thanks. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Bethany meets Serendipity] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Let me guess. The 14th Apostle, left out of the Bible because she's a woman? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • This girl's no woman. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [to Serendipity] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • No offense. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Oh, so those weren't tits I saw Jay cozying up to? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [hugs her breasts] What, these? You should know better than anybody at this table that tits don't make the woman. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Hell, the tubby coat-wearin' motherfucker's got tits, that damn sure doesn't make him a woman. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [to Loki] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Quit leering at me. People are gonna think I just broke up with you. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [sleep talking] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I didn't come in you, Pete, I swear. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [first lines] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Announcer: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Ladies and Gentlemen, the driving force behind Catholicism, wow, Cardinal Glick. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Cardinal Glick: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Thank you, thank you, thank you. Now we all know how the majority and the media in this country view the Catholic church. They think of us as a passe, archaic institution. People find the Bible obtuse... even hokey. Now in an effort to disprove all that the church has appointed this year as a time of renewal... both of faith and of style. For example, the crucifix. While it has been a time honored symbol of our faith, Holy Mother Church has decided to retire this highly recognizable, yet wholly depressing image of our Lord crucified. Christ didn't come to Earth to give us the willies... He came to help us out. He was a booster. And it is with that take on our Lord in mind that we've come up with a new, more inspiring sigil. So it is with great pleasure that I present you with the first of many revamps the "Catholicism WOW. " campaign will unveil over the next year. I give you... The Buddy Christ. Now that's not the sanctioned term we're using for the symbol, just something we've been kicking around the office, but look at it. Doesn't it... pop? Buddy Christ... 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [waking from a dream] I didn't cum on you, Pete, I swear. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Hello, we'd like two tickets to New Jersey, please. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bus Station Attendant: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jersey's sold out, sir. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bus Station Attendant: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • There's one at the same time tomorrow. I suggest you not underestimate the staggering drawing power of the Garden State, and show up two hours in advance. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Announcer: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Ladies and Gentlemen, the driving force behind Catholicism, wow, Cardinal Glick. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Cardinal Glick: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Thank you, thank you. Now we all know how the majority and the media in this country view the Catholic church. They think of us as a passe, archaic, institution. People find the bible obtuse, even hokey. Now in an effort to disprove all that, the church has appointed this year as a time of renewal, both of faith and of style. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • 50 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You know, I hear pregnant women can have sex until their third trimester. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • fdc 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I'll keep that in mind. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • All lines are currently down. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [about the protesters outside the Abortion Clinic] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Liz: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You're Catholic, can't you talk to them? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • They hate me more than you. At least you have an excuse, you're Jewish, you don't know any better. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Liz: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I don't think they'd accept that one, we used that one already when we killed Christ. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [to the female board member] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You're a pure soul... but you didn't say "God bless you" when I sneezed. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [raises his gun to the female board member's head] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [angrily] You're getting off light. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [as he leaves the board room] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You're so lucky. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Nun: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I never thought of it that way... what am I doing with my life... what am I...? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I know, I know. You should take all this money that you've been collecting for your parish and go out and buy yourself a nice dress. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Why? 'Cause I'm a black man. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Very basic strategy. If your enemies know where you are, then don't be there. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • No wonder he saw Jesus. Homey's rockin' the ganj. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Oh, I'm Jay, and this is my hetero-lifemate Silent Bob. I don't know who those kids were, but they would've kicked yours and Lunchbox's asses if I hadn't represented. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You are responsible for raising an icon which draws worship from the Lord. You have broken the first commandment. Not only that, I'm afraid not a one of you passes for a decent human being. Your continued existence is a mockery of morality. Like you, Mr. Burton. Last year cheated on your wife of 17 years 8 times. You even had sex with her best friend while you were supposed to be home watching the kids. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • In the bed that you and your wife share, no less. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Mr. Newman - you got your girlfriend drunk at last year's Christmas party and then paid a kid from the mail room to have sex with her while she was passed out, just so you could break up with her guilt-free when she sobbingly confessed in the morning. She killed herself two months later. Mr. Brace disowned his gay son. Very compassionate, Mr. Brace. Mr. Ray put his mother in a third-rate nursing home and then used the profits from the sale of her home to buy an oriental rug for himself. Heavens. Mr. Barker flew to Thailand on the company account to have sex with an eleven year old boy. Mr. Holtzman okayed the production of Mooby Dolls from materials he knew to be toxic and unsafe, because it was - survey says? - less costly. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [sees the female board member] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You, on the other hand, are an innocent. You lead a good life. Good for you. But you, Mr. Whitland, you have more skeletons in your closet than the rest of this assembled party. I cannot even mention them aloud. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • 3b 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [whispers something in Whitland's ear] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • fcd 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You're his father, you sick fuck. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Whitland starts crying] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [after Rufus has fallen from the sky] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Speaking of which, you're awfully nude. Rufus, is it? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Yes, Rufus it is. It's usually 'Long Rufus' but it's a little cold out here, ya know? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Liz gets out of her car and heads into Women's Clinic; picketers greet her] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Steve-Dave Pulasti: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You're gonna burn in hell, ya fuckin' baby killer. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Walter Grover: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Yeah, tell her, Steve-Dave. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Liz: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Holy shit, it's The Pope. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany Sloane: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Why are we here? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • God: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [pokes Bethany's nose] Nweep. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany Sloane: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [shouting] Why? What the fuck do you want with me? I fucking hate you. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Hospital P. A.: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I repeat, this is not a drill. This is the apocalypse. Please exit the hospital in an orderly fashion. Thank you. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • It never ends. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Behold the Metatron. Herald of the Almighty and voice of the one true God. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Consequences schmonsequences. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Rufus: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Are we too late? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • To save these poor schmucks?... Yeah. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I fell in love wit chew. We fell in love wit chew. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bartleby: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I'm going to have to start off by apologizing for my friend, he has a penchant for the dramatic. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Ever the fucking apple polisher! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Hey Big Bird? Wanna play the Counting Game? Count the shells Sucker Duck! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [proceeds to shoot off Bartelby's wings with an Uzi] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Snoogans. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • So, Jay tells us you're gonna sleep with him. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Do you know about voodoo? No constitution of faith, more an arrangement of superstitions. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • So you... what? Inspire people? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Serendipity: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • What just went down with your friends over there? It doesn't really take a Muse to inspire horny retards to empty their wallets. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [the Stygian Triplets close in on Bethany] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Snootch to the motherfuckin' nootch! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Jay and Silent Bob kick the Triplets' asses] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Whose house? Run's house! I said whose house? Run's house! Martin! Martin! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • 35 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [Serendipity lifts up her skirt] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • fa4 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Hey, they're getting a free show! Let me see that shit! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I forgot my little voodoo doll. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [looks at Whitland] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Wow. It really does look just like you. Maybe, if I believed enough... 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [pauses, then crushes voodoo doll of Whitland, who is terrified but unharmed] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [laughs] I don't believe in voodoo. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [leaves] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Loki: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [re-enters with a gun] But I do believe in this. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [shoots Whitland] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Jay: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • I get it! Holy Bartender! That's a great one! 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • But you'll be destroyed too. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Human, have you ever been to hell? I'd rather not exist than endure that expirence a secound longer, and if I have to drag down everyone else with me... so be it. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • So this is all about revenge. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Azrael: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • After the first couple of million years, no. My only goal was escape, but suprise suprise demons can't get into heaven... but angels can. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Well, I am the last Scion. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Actually, you WERE the last Scion. Now this 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • [puts his hand on Bethany's stomach] 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Metatron: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • is the last Scion. 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • Bethany: 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
  • You mean, I'm pregnant? 复制 复制成功 复制失败,请手动复制
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