耍酷一族Mallrats(1995)

[Brodie picks up a controller and continues a paused video game] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Rene: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What are you doing? You promised me breakfast. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Breakfast, shmreakfast. Look at the score, for Christ's sake. It's only the second period and I'm up 12 to Breakfasts come and go, Rene, but Hartford, "the Whale," they only beat Vancouver once, maybe twice in a lifetime. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shannon Hamilton: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

That's it. You're dead, mallrat. I'm gonna fuck you up beyond repair. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ladies and gentlemen, this tall drink of water headed my way is a pillar of the shopping community who informed me earlier today of a nefarious plan of his to screw my girlfriend in an extremely uncomfortable place. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gil Hicks: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What... like the back of a Volkswagen? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Jay and Silent Bob are hiding from La Fours] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Is he gone? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Halfway to Buy Me Toys by now. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[they come out of hiding] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Man, that bastard's faster than Walt Flanagan's dog... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Listen, not a year goes by, not a year, that I don't hear about some escalator accident involving some bastard kid which could have easily been avoided had some parent - I don't care which one - but some parent conditioned him to fear and respect that escalator. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You have my Punisher War Journal #6, my copy of "Fletch" and the remote control to my TV. Now, I know it's going to be hard to give this stuff up because of it's sentimental attachment... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Rene: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Sentimental attachment? Look, if I have any of that crap it's because you brought it over my house and left it there. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Okay, then let's talk about coming up with a schedule for visitation rights. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Rene: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

For what? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

For the mall. I figure you can take the odd days, I'll take the even days and weekends. When there's any special feature like a sidewalk sale... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Rene: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[interrupting] Brodie, Brodie... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

...or a boat show... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Rene: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[interrupting] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

19f 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie! I've always taken you with a grain of salt. On your birthday, when you told me to do a striptease to the theme of "Mighty Mouse", I said okay. On prom night at the hotel when you told me to sleep under the bed in case your mother burst in, I did it. And even during my grandmother's funeral when you told my relatives that you could see her nipples through her burial dress, I let that slide. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

fbd 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Rene: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Grabs Brodie by the ear] But if you think I'm gonna suffer any of your shit with a smile now that we're broken up, you're in for some serious fucking disappointment. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

How do I do that? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gwen: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

How is it that you recall the most trivial events? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I'll never forget it. How many times do you get to see Smokey fuck the Bandit? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gwen: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Didn't I look just like Burt Reynolds? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie, T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Except for the moustache. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shannon Hamilton: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You're sure you saw her get on? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Maybe she was getting off... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Maybe he's calmed down, we'll talk about it reasonably. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Reasonably shmeasonably, you should go over there and give him shit. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

After all he's done to you, you should still kinda stick it to him. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

How do you propose I do that? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You stinkpalm him. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Stinkpalm? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You take your hand and stick it in your ass like this. You been walkin' all day and you're nervous, so no doubt you'll be sweaty as hell. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You should see yourself right now, a grown man with his hand down his pants. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah i probably look like my old man. So you shake hands with the guy, "Hello Mr. Svenning how have you been?" 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Whats the point? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You know how long it takes for that smell to come off? Scrub all you want, it'll stick around for at least two days. How does he explain it to his colleagues and family? They'll think he doesn't know how to wipe his ass properly. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Meanwhile you yourself are left with a hand that smells like shit. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Small price to pay for the smiting of one's enemies. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brandi is the past my friend. You face forward, or you face the possibility of shock and damage. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Brodie gets knocked down by a metal beam] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Where the hell did that come from? What's going on here? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Looks like a stage is being erected. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What is this monstrosity? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Maybe it's for the Easter Bunny pictures. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Impossible, the Easter Bunny Court is down at the other end of the mall, it's been there since two days after Christmas. I want answers! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Bob Summers: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Our first suitor goes to Marymount College where he majors in economics. Say hi to Doug Paging! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

DO IT DOUG! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I took you shopping all the time! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

42 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Banging his hands against the elevator wall] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

fef 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Rene: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You took me where you went shopping, you jerk! You think I care what store in that shitpit dirt mall has the latest godzilla bootlegs? Do you call eating pizza in the same dive pizzeria every night eating out? Do I give a shit what two comic labels are crossing over characters, Selling two editions of the book in varied-ink chromium covers? I'm a girl, damn it! I wanna do girly things! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brandi: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Suitor number 3, is your kiss like a soft breeze, a firm handshake or a jackhammer? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gil Hicks: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Definitely a jackhammer, I'm in there with some pressure and when I'm done, you're not the same as before. You're changed. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Where do you come up with this shit? That's the cheesiest response to an honest question I have ever heard. I saw you kiss and it wasn't anything like that. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Bob Summers: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Chuckling] Suitor #2, you'll have to wait until you're addressed before you respond. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Richard Dawson, why don't you just go back to your podium until it's time to play The Feud. All right? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Audience laughs] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gil Hicks: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Who the hell did you see me kiss? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Some dude backstage. I don't know who he was but he seemed unimpressed. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gil Hicks: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I didn't kiss any guy backstage. I swear. I'm not gay. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Hey, Suitorette, this guys a homophobe. You heard how repulsed he sounded. Is this the kind of guy you want to spend a vacation with? This hate-monger? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gil Hicks: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I don't hate gay people. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

So you love them? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gil Hicks: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yes. I mean no. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Textbook closet case self-loather. Can't be comfortable with his own sexuality. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[to T.S] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You're gonna listen to me? To something I said? Hasn't it become abundantly clear during the tenure of our friendship that I don't know shit? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Tell me, did you ever fart in front of her? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

No, why do you ask? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I never farted in front of Renee. Last week, I let one slip and today she dumps me. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Renee's not the shallow type. You're not insinuating... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

She was going down on me at the time. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Retches] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What can I say, I was feeling relaxed, when I feel relaxed I squirt. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

If all she did was dump you, you got off light. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Where do you get these wonderful toys? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[c.f. Batman (1989)] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Silent Bob: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Adventure, excitement... a Jedi craves not these things. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[c.f. Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back (1980)] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned for Sega. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

25 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

ff2 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I would've made a sexy chick. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

My Grandmother always used to say "why buy the cow, when you can get the sex for free". 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

She said that? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

All the time, before she became a lesbian on her 60th Birthday, but that's besides the point. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You fuckers think just because a guy reads comics he can't start some shit? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

The usual vault rules apply: Touch not, lest ye be touched. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You're such an anal retentive bastard. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Hey, I tried to teach you how to handle comics in the sixth grade, but oh no. You wanted to play little league. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

But they're engaged. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Doesn't matter, can't happen. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Why not? It's bound to come up. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

It's impossible, Lois could never have Superman's baby. Do you think her fallopian tubes could handle the sperm? I guarantee you he blows a load like a shotgun right through her back. What about her womb? Do you think it's strong enough to carry her child? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Sure, why not? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

He's an alien, for Christ sake. His Kyrptonian biological makeup is enhanced by earth's yellow sun. If Lois gets a tan the kid could kick right through her stomach. Only someone like Wonder Woman has a strong enough uterus to carry his kid. The only way he could bang regular chicks is with a kryptonite condom. That would kill him. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

How is it that I go from the verge of hot Floridian sex with Brandi to man of steel coital debates with you in the food court? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Cookie stand isn't part of the food court. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Of course it is. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

The food court is downstairs. The cookie stand is upstairs. It not like we're talking quantum physics here. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

The cookie stands counts as an eatery, eateries are part of the food court. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Bullshit. Eateries that operate within the designated square downstairs count as food court. Anything outside, of said designated sqaure, counts as an autonomous unit for mid-mall snacking. Now, if your going to wax intellectual about the subject... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[At a Dating Game-like game show] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brandi: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Second suitor: if we were making whoopee, what sounds would you make? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Wait, what's whoopee? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brandi: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You know, being intimate. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What? Like fucking? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Silent Bob stole the schematics from some foolish carpenter and found a weakness just like the fucking Death Star. You knock this crossbeam out and, fuckin' bickety-bam, the whole stage comes crashing down. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Well we were thinking of something simple, but hey, if you want to destroy the stage, we're all for that. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[first lines] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

25 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Brodie's voice] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

feb 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

One time my cousin Walter got this cat stuck up his ass. True story. He bought it at our local mall, so the whole fiasco wound up on the news. It was embarrasing for my relatives and all, but next week, he did it again. Different cat, same results, complete with another trip to the emergency room. So, I run into him a week later in the mall and he's buying another cat. And I says to him, "Jesus, Walt! What are you doing? You know you're just gonna get this cat stuck up your ass too. Why don't you knock it off?" And he said to me, "Brodie, how the hell else am I supposed to get the gerbil out?" My cousin was a weird guy. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brandi: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Second suitor, would you ever make whoopie in public? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I already did once today. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[clicks his finger at Renee] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

But my cousin Walter jerked off in public once. True story. He was on a plane to New Mexico when all of the sudden the hydraulics went. The plane started spinning around, going out of control, so he decides it's all over and whips it out and starts beating it right there. So all the other passengers take a cue from him and they start whipping it out and beating like mad. So all the passengers are beating off, plummeting to their certain doom, when all of the sudden, *Snap* the hydraulics kick back in. The plane rights itself and it land safely and everyone puts their pieces or, whatever, you know, away and deboard. No one mentions the phenomenon to anyone else. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gil Hicks: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Well, did he cum, or what? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jesus Christ, man. There's just some things you don't talk about in public. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shannon Hamilton: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You wanna say something? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah. About a million things, but I can't express myself monosyllabically enough for you to understand it all. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[subtitle, "William eventually saw the sailboat."] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Willam Black: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You've probably had a slew of women since her, am I right? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Stan Lee: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oh, lots of women. Jagger and me, we had a running contest to see who had the most. In fact, last time I checked I was way ahead. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

DAMN that's hot! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What you need is a fatty-boom-batty blunt, and I guarantee you'll be seeing a sailboat, an ocean, and maybe even some of those big-titted mermaids doing some of that lesbian shit. Look at me, look at me, you sloppy bitch! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I love the smell of commerce in the morning. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brandi: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Suitor Number Three, what would our first date be like? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gil Hicks: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Well, uh, first I'd take you shopping to stores you wanna shop in, and then we'd do a little lunch, probably at the Cheese Haus, followed by some golfing. And then at night, we'd take in an opera, probably Die Fledermaus, and then I'd follow it up with a drive to a secluded beach where I'd pop on the radio and we could slow-dance till the sun came up. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

That was the biggest load of crap I've ever heard. I mean, look at you. You're the kind of guy who would beg for sex. And I should know, we can smell our own. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

3e 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

How easily do you quit? Say you wind up with one of us? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

fe6 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Hopefully not Rush Limbaugh over here. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gil Hicks: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Well, now, I'm not like Rush Limbaugh. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Well, why not? Because he's fat? Now you have something against fat people, too? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Brodie introduces Tricia to T.S] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint, meet Tricia Jones. They call her Trish "the dish". 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Tricia Jones: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Nobody calls me that. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[after hitting La Fours over the head with a baseball bat] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Come to me, son of Jor-El. Kneel before Zod. Snootchie-bootchies. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[as Silent Bob is 'flying' across the mall towards the stage] Fly, Fatass, fly. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Little Girl: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[looking at a Magic Eye poster] Wow. It's a schooner. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Willam Black: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ha ha ha ha. You dumb bastard. It's not a schooner... it's a Sailboat. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Little Boy: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

A schooner IS a sailboat stupid head. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Willam Black: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[becoming enraged] You know what. There is NO Easter Bunny. Over there, that's just a guy in a suit. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Willam Black: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brenda? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Rene: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[hitting him] DICK. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Brodie Bruce speaking of T.S. and Brandi's love] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You two are retarded for each other. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Look, if I had any kind of glow it's because I just got laid. I would look the same had I banged anyone in that elevator... present company excluded. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Deny it all you want. I think that you're too proud to admit that you want her back. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I suddenly want something very bad to happen to you. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[TS elbows Gwen in the chest, she hits him in the groin] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

See, that's what you get for fucking with me. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Why don't they ever bring back or remake good shows, like 'BJ and the Bear.' Now there's a concept I can't get enough of, a man and his monkey. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Stan Lee: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You know, I think you ought to get him some help. He seems to be really hung up on super heroes' sex organs. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You should see yourself right now - a grown man with his hand down his pants. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah, I probably look like my old man. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Silent Bob here's an electrical genius. He won the science fair in eighth grade by turning his mom's vibrator into a CD player using some chicken wire and shit.The mother fucker's like MacGyver. No, the mother fucker's *better than* MacGyver. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You're giving up? You? You used to be stand-up guy, what happened to him? The guy who punched Amanda's gross-out mother after she called him "low class". 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

22 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

That wasn't me. It was you. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

ff6 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oh, yeah. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

And it wasn't her mother, it was her grandmother. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

No wonder the bitch went down so fast. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Jay is reading a Hustler. He shows a spread to Silent Bob] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dude, this one looks like your mom. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Silent Bob nods] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Jay explains the details of Operation Drive By to Silent Bob] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

First you take a run at La Fours with a sock full of quarters. I'd do it, but I pulled my back at humping your mom last night. Neetch. Okay, you clock him on his headpiece and knock his ass out cold. That's when phase two kicks in. I attack the structure Wolvie Berzerk style, and knock out the fuckin' pin and bickety bam, the motherfucker is rubble. Hence, no game show. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jesus, how much did you smoke? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

All it took was a phat, chronic blunt. These guys were lightweights. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

How much do I owe you? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

My treat. As long as you promise that the next time you pop your old lady, you make her call you "Jay." Snootchie Bootchies. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Let's hope there is a next time. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dude, you the mad chick magnet. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Hey, look at that ring. What is that? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jared Svenning: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

That is, um, my Junior College class ring. Cum Laude, ' 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I also hope to cum loud one day, preferably in a 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

There is something out there that can help us ease our simultanious double loss. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What? Ritual suicide? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

No, you idiot, the fucking mall! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I'd prefer ritual suicide. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oh come on man it'll be great. They have these new cookies at the cookie stand, you have to try 'em. They're awesome. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[the videotape of Shannon back-dooring Trica is playing on the big screen, with cheesy 70s porno music in background] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shannon Hamilton: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah, who's your favourite New Kid. Yeah, call me Joey. Oh, come on. Don't make me get loose. Yeah, that's right. Call me Donnie. Oh, girl. Oh, please don't go girl. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Goddamn. This is one wacky game show. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[to the cops] Hey! That girl's only 15! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[cops focus their attention on Shannon] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shannon Hamilton: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ah, I thought she was 36! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[cops are approaching him] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shannon Hamilton: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Come on, guys. Tell me you wouldn't have popped her. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Brodie is trying to get into the comic book store] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Hey, what's going on in there? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Steve-Dave Pulasti: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I was warned about you. Take it easy before I have you removed from the mall. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

33 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Warned? What the fuck are you talking about? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

fba 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Walt "Fanboy" Grover: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Tell him, Steve-Dave. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Fuck you, Fanboy. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[breaking up the fight] Can you two testosterone-seething, he-man, comic book fans finish up with this display of tough guy back-and-forth? I have some questions that need answering. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Jay explains the details of Operation Dark Knight to Silent Bob] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Okay Lunchbox, let's try this again. We tie you to the roof and you jump off and sail like a Spitfire passing right over the arch nemesis La Fours. You then swing up to the stage and knock out the pin. And when that's gone the stage is trashed and we go smoke a bowl. You got it? Now get your fat ass up there. And dude, don't forget your helmet. Snoogens. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I was going to propose to her. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Where? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

The Universal Tour. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You're kidding. What part? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

When Jaws popped out of the water. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Too bad I'm not trying to marry you. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Tricia Jones: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I heard that you were going to propose to Brandi Svenning at some theme park. When are men going to learn that women want ROMANCE, not Mr. Toad's Wild Ride... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Hey, now, be fair. EVERYONE wants Mr. Toad's Wild Ride. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Most of the time I'm just talking out of my ass - or sticking my hand in it. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[about the break-up letter from Renee] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Yeah, and she also said I had no dick. Which precedes the financial question, proving once more what women really look for. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Silent Bob is trying to levitate a cigarette] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What's he doing? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shithead here watched Empire and Jedi last week and ever since then, he's been trying to do the Jedi mind trick. The crazy fuck thinks he can levitate shit with his thoughts. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[slaps the cigarette out of Silent Bob's hand] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Knock it off. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[to Silent Bob] The force is strong with this one. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Dude, don't encourage him. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shannon Hamilton: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Smart-ass ex-boyfriend! I've got two things to tell you. One: I don't like you. I see you every week in this mall. I don't like you shiftless layabouts. You're one of those fucking mallrat kids. You don't come to the mall to shop or work. You hang out and act like you fucking live here. Well, I have no respect for people with no shopping agenda. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Is this what's known as motivated salesmanship? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Shannon Hamilton beats up Brodie] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shannon Hamilton: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Rene told me to leave you alone, but she's fucking clueless. The newly single always feel a bit protective of the ex-boyfriend. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

49 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

If this is her idea of protective, I'd hate to have her mad at me. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

ffb 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shannon Hamilton: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You see, Bruce, I like to pick up girls on the rebound from a disappointing relationship. They're much more in need of solace and they're fairly open to suggestion. And, I use that to fuck them some place very uncomfortable. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What, like the back of a Volkswagen? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shannon Hamilton: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

No. More like someplace girls dread. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Brodie tries to take a poke at Shannon, Shannons gives him another beat-down] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I got to hit the bathroom. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

PLEASE. Don't say "hit". 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[about the indoor flea market] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Come on, this is the dirt mall. Cops don't come here. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Neither does any self-respecting consumer. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ivannah: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Free your minds. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I'd like to free something... 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Haven't you ever heard the phrase "The customer is always right?" 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shannon Hamilton: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Let me tell you something. Let me give you a little secret, okay. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[yells it right in T.S.' ear] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shannon Hamilton: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

The customer is always an asshole! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Say, would you like a chocolate covered pretzel? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You're fucking kidding me! The Easter bunny did this? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

All I said was that the Easter bunny at the Menlo Park mall was more convincing and he just jumped the railing and knocked me down. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

He's fucking dead! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Oh let it go, he's under a lot of pressure. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[T.S. and Gwen approach them] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What the hell happened? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

The guy in the Easter bunny suit kicked his ass. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I had it coming. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[to Silent Bob] Fuck all that shit. Come on, Silent Bob. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Jay and Silent Bob leave] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What really happened? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

The proprietor of Fashionable Male beat a raincheck into my stomach. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gwen: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Shannon Hamilton? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You know that guy? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Gwen: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I went out with him once after we dated. He tried to screw me some place very uncomfortable. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What? Like the back of a Volkswagen? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Sounds like his M.O. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[referring to the tape of Shannon having anal sex with Trish] Did you see that shit? You call that romance? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Rene: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I call that illegal. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[to Jay and Silent Bob] You two up for getting stoned? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Look who you're asking! 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

< 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

f91 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

a name="qt0202495"> 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Rene: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[about why she cries in the bathroom] Do you really wanna know? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

I asked, didn't I? I'm playing the role of concerned guy. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Ivannah: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Fucussa. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

That's what I was thinking. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

She said 'focus'. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Whatever. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You know about this game show they got goin' on here? We need you guys to somehow ensure that it doesn't happen. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Is that it? We were gonna do that anyway. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Really? Why? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Jay: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What else are we gonna do? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Stan Lee: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

They look happy, don't they? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

What, the bras? 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

[Reading the break-up letter that Renee gave Brodie] Woah, she calls you "callow" in here. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

You say that like it's bad. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

T.S. Quint: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

It means frightened and weak-willed. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Brodie: 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

Really? Shit. That was the only part of the letter I thought was complimentary. 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制

耍酷一族 (1995)

演职人员(116)

凯文·史密斯

莎侬·多赫提

杰瑞米·伦敦

杰森·李

克莱尔·弗兰妮

本·阿弗莱克

乔伊·劳伦·亚当斯

Renée Humphrey

杰森·缪斯

伊桑·苏普利

斯坦·李

普瑞斯西拉·巴恩斯

迈克尔·鲁克

Carol Banker

Steven Blackwell

Kyle Boe

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