Richard Richard:
[after an incident involving a blow-up doll named Monica and some superglue, Richard has, apparently, lost his penis] 复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制
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Ah, Monica. You were the first, and you'll be the last. You took my cherry... right off!
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Richard Richard:
Eddie I have decided to kill myself because I'm £15,000 in debt!
Edward Hitler:
Fucking Hell! A line from the play! I never saw that one coming! We're only an hour into and he's spoken an actual line. Wow!
Richard Richard:
Yeah well just shut up and get on with it or else we'll still be here next Thursday. I've had enough of Southampton to last me a life time.
Edward Hitler:
Right, so your philosophy is... bollocks?
Richard Richard:
Yes!
Edward Hitler:
Well that's a great view on life isn't it?
Richard Richard:
Oh who cares about views on life, I thought we were talking philosophy?
Edward Hitler:
But your philosophy is bollocks
Richard Richard:
So let's talk bollocks!
Edward Hitler:
BUT THAT'S ALL WE EVER DO!
Richard Richard:
So let's do what we always do!
Edward Hitler:
Oh god, and so it goes on, day after day, year in year out, slime in this ear, slime in that ear, don't you ever yearn for change?
[huge applause from the audience]
Edward Hitler:
Alan Rickman eat your heart out!
[to Richie]
Edward Hitler:
And cue
Richard Richard:
[Looks at the audience who seems to have taken Eddie's side] Right. Wanna give me the feedline again in front of all your friends?
Edward Hitler:
[Laughs to himself] Yea, sorry. I... I forgot to mention I was actually born in Southampton! It's my only home!
[another huge applause]
Richard Richard:
Oh Eddie Eddie Eddie you were born in Southampton? Wow! Why did you ever leave?
Edward Hitler:
That was a bit below the belt
[thinks of a comeback]
Edward Hitler:
Because... I found the railway station!
[another HUGE applause]
Richard Richard:
[to the audience] Stop fucking clapping!
[imitates them]
Richard Richard:
Bastards!
[to someone in the audience]
Richard Richard:
Especially you! You oughtta fucking jump!
Edward Hitler:
That's no way to speak to my mother
[to the audeince]
Edward Hitler:
Sorry mum复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制
