After being fired from their jobs as security guards, Josh and Ivan form Video Aces, a video production company. Using Josh's talent and Iva...更多>
FBI Man #1: Remember what we did to Jello Biafra? Mo Fuzz: All good things come in threes. Josh Tager: It's not good things. It's celebrity deaths that come in threes. Ivan Alexeev: You look ravishing and I'd like to chew on your thighs. Samantha Gregory: I thought we had a professional relationship. Ivan Alexeev: So I'll pay. Ivan: You, you've got no ambition! You're content just existing! You need what I've got, brother. Josh: Herpes? [Ivan & Josh explain their tardiness to their security boss] Ivan: Anybody else who'd save Pablo Casales - perhaps the greatest cellist in the world with the possible exception of Yo-Yo Ma - from a fiery car wreck on Sunset Boulevard would be bragging about it, but not Josh. He didn't want to spoil the 11 o'clock news for you. Norton: Don't bullshit me. I'm a big cello fan! Casales died years ago! Norman Mart: Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Russians have satellite laser weapons. Why can't we, too? Mo Fuzz: This group is hotter than hot. They've sold more records in Sweden than Abba. Mo Fuzz: I know you want to work for Mo Fuzz. And Mo Fuzz wants you to. But first, I'm going to need to you do something for me... on spec. Ivan Alexeev: Josh, losing those jobs is the best thing that ever happened to us! We're free to pursue our destiny! Josh Tager: What, abysmal failure? Ivan Alexeev: Negativity festers in you, man! [Watching a music video] Josh Tager: Stupid. Inane. Vapid. Mind-rot. Stench. Pabulum. Ivan Alexeev: Yeah, it's all right! [after being "HA!"-ed] Ivan Alexeev: I'm gonna make him eat that syllable. Ivan Alexeev: You know, Josh, in primitive societies, after they sever the umbilical cord, they eat the placenta in a ritualistic ceremony [bites into a burger] Ivan Alexeev: Want a bite? [Belinda is setting fire to a painting with a welding torch] Belinda Mart: You like it? Josh Tager:
Like it? What is it? Belinda Mart: I call it..."Destruction Of Art." Josh Tager: Look, Ivan... I hope you're not putting too much faith in me. I don't even know if I... Ivan Alexeev: "IF"? Instant Failure! "FEAR" - False Evidence Appearing Real! We've talked about this! Belinda Mart: Ivan, why aren't you helping Josh set up the equipment? Ivan Alexeev: He's an artist. He's hands-on. You know what I do? I use my selling techniques to give my artist friend the personal freedom he needs. Freedom, choices, possibilities. That's what I'm about. The boring administrative stuff, you know? I envy him. [beat] Ivan Alexeev: Can you get me another drink? Belinda Mart: Sure. Bald Executive: Everybody loves Menudo! Heavy Metal Fan: What time is it? What time is it? Oh! I hate waiting! Video Vixen: [after making the Blender Children's video, the video vixens swarm around Josh with requests] Teach me to read!