A group of juvenile criminals is sent for vacation to Kamp Kikakee. The clumsy Ernest has to care for them, although he doesn't even know ho...更多>
Mr. Tipton: Okay, one more chance, but your boys better get with the program. Know what I mean? Ernest P. Worrell: Oh I know what you mean, sir, thank you. Nurse St. Cloud: And that was the ritual of the Blade, the Stone, and the Arrow. Ernest P. Worrell: Like in our culture: Paper, Rock, Scissors. Ernest P. Worrell: One monkey don't stop no show. Counselor Stennis: You're gonna learn to swim the Stennis way. Ernest P. Worrell: All aboard that's going ashore! [Ernest is getting his shots and is in pain] Ernest P. Worrell: I did it! I took the Lindbergh baby! I am 'Josef Mengele' qv! AAAHHH! [the camp sign falls on Ernest] Mr. Tipton: What happened? Chief St. Cloud: Ernest broke the sign. Mr. Tipton: Well, at least nobody was hurt. Mr. Tipton: Have you ever held a leadership position? Ernest P. Worrell: I had a ant farm once. Ernest P. Worrell: Somethin' burnin'? Ayyy-EWW! Ernest P. Worrell: No. I-I can't eat on an empty stomach. Ernest P. Worrell: And then, he thought he heard it, and that's when Vernon turned around and looked in his rear window... and there, staring back at him was the hook man! [laughs sinsterly] Ernest P. Worrell: So, he stomps on the gas, and he tore out of there, and the next day, Vernon went to get in his car, and there, hanging on the rear view mirror, was the hook! Crutchfield: I thought it was supposed to be on the door handle. Ernest P. Worrell: Well yeah it was, but then Vernon hung it on the rear view mirror like dice and baby shoes. Ernest P. Worrell: My motto is, "I never met a bad kid." State Supervisor: Then let me introduce you to some. These misfits were selected by their ward leaders as most in need of help. [they step over to the boys] State Supervisor: This here's the ringleader, Bobby Wayne. He's been in and out of institutions like this since he was eleven. Bobby Wayne: Since I was nine. State Supervisor: And this here's Crutchfield. Twelve years old and already a master thief.
: [Hands back Ernest's wallet] It's like a... gift or something. Ernest P. Worrell: Well, thanks [takes the wallet] State Supervisor: And here's Danny Simpson. He comes from a long line of troublemakers. Danny: It's a family tradition. I've got a reputation to uphold. State Supervisor: And the Albert Eeeeiiinstein of this institution, Chip Ooooozgood. Chip Ozgood: [Says nothing] State Supervisor: [Shakes her head] Butch Too Cool Vargas. Butch 'Bubba' Vargas: [Says nothing, looks at her contemptuously]