advertisement [about an enormous pile of meat they stole] Richard Rich: Good lord Eddie, how'd you get all that meat down your trousers! Edward Catflap: That's what all the girls say. Richard Rich: Smut is the last recourse of the emotional cripple, Eddie. For it is a psychological truism that they talk about that which they cannot do. Edward Catflap: Oh, is that why you're always talking about acting, plop-pants? [During a brainstorming session to come up with a new idea for an advert] Edward Catflap: I've always thought that Corn Flakes look a bit like people. Richard Rich: We've got two problems. No food, and the Nolan Sisters. What should we do? Edward Catflap: Eat the Nolans! Edward Catflap: Richie, if you don't stop talking, I am going to cut off your head, put it in the microwave until it goes pink, mash it up with a bit of milk and butter, and ram it up your backside! Richard Rich: [Eddie is sleeping in Richie's bed] What's the matter with your bed? Edward Catflap: It's covered in lager. Richard Rich: You mean, you threw up on it. Edward Catflap: There was a certain amount of unpleasantness, yeah. I don't see what you're so upset about, I've been very considerate. I could've easily thrown up on your bed and slept in my own. Richard Rich: And what is wrong with the lavatory? Edward Catflap: Richie. You know I hate sleeping in the lavatory, you can never get comfy.