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Steve Guttenberg
演员
饰Officer Carey...
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Bubba Smith
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饰Officer Moses...
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David Graf
演员
饰Officer Eugen...
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Marion Ramsey
演员
饰Officer Laver...
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Colleen Camp
演员
饰Sgt. Kathleen...
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Howard Hesseman
演员
饰Capt. Peter
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George Gaynes
演员
饰Cmdt. Eric La...
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Mahoney:
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Never fool with a fuzz ball.
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Lt. Mauser:
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You're not playing with a full deck, are you?
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Sergeant Proctor:
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Oh, I don't play cards.
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Lt. Mauser:
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Any day now, Mahoney, and your little ass is mine.
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Mahoney:
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You wanted to see me, sir?
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Lt. Mauser:
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Mahoney, didn't your mother teach you how to knock?
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Mahoney:
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It depends. Sir? I hope this isn't going to be too personal? I heard what you said about my little butt and I don't know how to break this to you, sir, but I'm straight.
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[after seeing his cat pooped in the cereal]
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Sgt. Vinnie:
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Oh I'm sorry, would you like some?
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Mahoney:
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[shocked] I'm on a diet.
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Lt. Mauser:
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Let me see your piece. Why isn't there any ammo in here?
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Officer Hooks:
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I was afraid it would go off.
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Lt. Mauser:
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Oh, you were afraid it would go off were you? That's one on Hooks
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Lt. Mauser:
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That is all. Thanks for your time.
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Officer Hooks:
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What about me, sir? Don't I get a car?
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Lt. Mauser:
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[imitating Hooks] "Oh, what about me sir? Don't I get a car?" No, you don't get a car. You get a nice little chair and a nice little desk and a nice little office for your nice little voice!
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Officer Hooks:
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Asshole!
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Lt. Mauser:
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That's two!
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Sgt. Vinnie:
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Bunky? Bunky how many times do I have to tell you? The litter box, the litter box.
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[Sargent Vinnie picks up a chocolate bar out of a rubbish bin]
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Sgt. Vinnie:
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Look at that. A half eaten chocolate bar. It's hardly been touched. Do you want some?
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Mahoney:
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No thanks.
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[Mahoney wears a microphone while infiltrating Zed's gang]
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Mahoney:
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So what is this place? It smells like animals.
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Sgt. Vinnie:
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They took him to my place?
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39
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Capt. Peter 'Pete' Lassard
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cf7
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:
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Come on guys step on it.
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[Vinnie's dog steps on Captain Lassard's lap]
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Capt. Peter 'Pete' Lassard:
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Not you Lou.
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Greengrocer:
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Not on broccoli!
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[Cmdt. Lassard's water in his fishbowl is boiling on the hibachi]
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Cmdt. Eric Lassard:
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This fish is boiling.
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Japanese chef:
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Oh you want stir fry?
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Chief Hurst:
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Mauser, you're the most incredible ass-kisser I have ever seen.
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Lt. Mauser:
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Thank you very much, sir. I do my best.
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Lt. Mauser:
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Hey, wait a minute! My hands are stuck with my head! What the fuck?
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Sergeant Proctor:
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Hightower!
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Officer Moses Hightower:
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Yo!
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Lt. Mauser:
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Yo?
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Officer Moses Hightower:
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Yo, sir!
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Lt. Mauser:
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Yo, sir... You must be from the south! That's "Yes, sir." You got foot patrol.
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Chief Hurst:
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It's official, Captain Lassard. This is now the worst precinct in the entire city! Burglary up 25%, armed robbery up 30%, vandalism up 44%.
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Lt. Mauser:
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Actually, Chief, if you'd look, burglary is actually up 48%.
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Chief Hurst:
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Thank you. Who are you?
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Lt. Mauser:
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Mauser, sir. M as in man A-U, S as in Sam.
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Capt. Peter 'Pete' Lassard:
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Oh, shut up and sit down, Mauser. He asked for your name, not your biography.
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Lt. Mauser:
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E-R, sir.
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Lt. Mauser:
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Mahoney, what kind of clown do you think I am?
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Mahoney:
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A juggling clown?
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Zed:
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[after their first date - Tackleberry is about to leave] Tackleberry!
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Officer Larvell Jones:
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[turns] Yes?
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Zed:
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[lustfully] I love you.
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Officer Larvell Jones:
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[pause] DAMN!
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[they start to make out]
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