Primarily a spoof of the Friday the 13th series, but also takes shots at several other horror films. After his family moves to a new house, ...更多>
Yolanda: What do the building codes say about filling the basement with earth?
Marge, the Real Estate Broker
: It's... it's a finished basement. Waldemar: Not yet it isn't. Marge, the Real Estate Broker: Do you have children? Waldemar: As often as we can. Van Helsing: Some vampires will believe anything. Waldemar: He's in there, and we're out here. He's got that book by now! Yolanda: If he had that book by now, he wouldn't still be in there. Waldemar: But we'd still be out here. Waldemar: If you weren't immortal, you'd kill yourself. Yolanda: Oh, look. Isn't that that boy Bavarian from Budapest? Waldemar: No, that's a fruit bat from the Philippines. Television Announcer: George and Elizabeth Bennetson got into their car to go to a party... But this wasn't going to be the kind of party they expected. The guests are about to arrive - John: Billy, will you turn that thing off? Billy: I did turn it off. Van Helsing: In one minute, terrible things are going to happen! (A scream is heard off-camera.) Um, less than a minute? Van Helsing: When I get that book, I will rule the world! Think of it - famine! War! Death! Van Helsing: Selling the house now would be like closing the barn door after the horses eat your children.