Emmet: Now, if you'd made it Irish whiskey... Jennings: We'll get along famously. Father Oliver Van Horne: Desolate place, isn't it? Emmet: If God had wanted to give the world an enema, he'd have stuck the nozzle in here. Father Oliver Van Horne:
What's your opinion of priests?
Emmet: Well, what would you think of a man who wears skirts or a celibate who wants to be called "Father"? Delgado: The woman who cannot speak... cannot complain! Emmet: That was one hell of a mass, Father! Father Oliver Van Horne: I have a small confession to make. All is not quite what it seems. Father Oliver Van Horne: Why in hell can't I learn to mind my own business? Father Oliver Van Horne: Just what the hell kind of game do you think you're playing? Emmet: She goes with us. Father Oliver Van Horne: Over my dead body she does. Emmet: [points gun at Van Horne] Oh, that can be arranged. Emmet: Holy Saint Patrick! Father Oliver Van Horne: I would suggest that you not be here when he wakes up. Jennings: Where would you suggest I go? Father Oliver Van Horne: To Hell. Jennings: [Looking out at an execution by firing squad] A bullring. What a terrible place to die. Father Oliver Van Horne: Well, you've got a choice. Firing squad or your Irish friend. How would you like to die? Jennings: From natural causes, naturally. Jennings: [laughing] It's... it's the resurrection, and I didn't even wait three days! Col. Santilla: It's not often I have such distinguished guests- men straight from the gates of Hell. Jennings: Life is full of constant surprises! Emmet: Come on, fat man! Jennings: My size is due to a glandular condition, Mr. Keogh, and is a subject on which I harbor absolutely no sensitivity. Father Oliver Van Horne: I don't wish any of you to risk your lives. Instead, I ask each of you to go to your homes and pray for me. That I may be brave and resolute in bringing to Tomas de la Plata the wrath of God. Father Oliver Van Horne: What do you say to a drink? Jennings: I never touch the rotten stuff except when I'm alone or with people. Father Oliver Van Horne: Of course. Father Oliver Van Horne: One missing. One drunk. Swell. De La Plata: You were going to have a very lonely walk, priest. Father Oliver Van Horne: You're here. That's all that matters. De La Plata: I thought suicide was a mortal sin. Father Oliver Van Horne: What d
oes he want? Nacho: He wants you, Father. Just you. Father Oliver Van Horne: Somebody get my bag. It's in the car. Emmet: Where are you going? Father Oliver Van Horne: To kill Tomas de la Plata. Father Oliver Van Horne: We three faced the firing squad together. Everything else is just borrowed time. Jennings: God protects fools and drunks, not idiots. Father Oliver Van Horne: God works in mysterious ways. Jennings: [laughing and wheezing] They think they'll make a hero out of me. Jennings: Which way is north? Moreno: That way, Senor. Jennings: Mexico, here I come. [Thinking] Jennings: All my life I could have played it safe. Think of all the fun I would have missed. Chela: Emmet? Emmet: For heaven's sake, woman. Don't speak now! Father Oliver Van Horne: [laughing] Well, I'll be goddamned. Señora De La Plata: What is it, Father? Father Oliver Van Horne: It's... a gospel... according to Van Horne.