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Clint Braden:
Hey, piano player.
Cully:
Yes, Mr. Braden.
Clint Braden:
Tonight try to play the notes the way that they were written.
Cully:
I'll use both hands.
Clint Braden:
And if your pal Johnny is late again, I hope he can dance with a broken leg.
Cully:
That's what I like about you, boss. Always ready with a pat on the back.
Cully:
You seen Johnny?
Frankie:
Look under the nearest pair of dice.
Peg:
Don't you even say hello to your wife?
Cully:
Hello, wife!
Frankie:
Peg, how can I get Johnny to give up gambling?
Peg:
Easy! A bullet in the head, poison in his coffee, a fatal knife wound. Oh, nothing to it.
Cully:
Where have you been? I lost your trail at the blackjack table.
Johnny:
I ran into a guy who told me about a gypsy fortune-teller. She's got a hot cup of tea leaves.
Cully:
I'm a coffee man myself! What happened with your astrologer? She couldn't read the stars on a cloudy night?
Johnny:
You got to have faith, Cully.
Cully:
And money. How much did you lose tonight?
Johnny:
How much did I have?
Cully:
That's what you lost last night. You're holding your own.
[Cully hands Johnny a mirror but it drops and breaks]
Johnny:
Seven years' bad luck!
Cully:
It was already cracked.
Johnny:
Okay... Only five!
Cully:
Be over before you know it.
Johnny:
Aww! Say, five. That's a hunch. Loan me five bucks, Cully.
Cully:
I can't afford you much longer.
Johnny:
Put the five on number
Cully:
I'll lose my job if I'm late.
Johnny:
I'll lose my confidence if I pass up a hunch bet.
Frankie:
[After Frankie and Johnny get through performing the Petunia number on stage] What were those signals?
Johnny:
What signals?
Frankie:
Between you and Cully, I'm not blind.
Johnny:
Oh, those signals. Nothing, he just made a little bet for me.
Frankie:
Now you've got helpers. Can't you lose fast enough alone?
Johnny:
[Frankie starts walking away mad] Hey, where are you going?
Frankie:
To have my head examined. There must be a hole in it!
Johnny:
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2b
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You can't help it if you're in love.
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feb
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Frankie:
[Cully shows up and Frankie bumps into him as she continues to walk away mad]
[shouts]
Frankie:
Oh, you born losers, both of you!
Cully:
What's the matter with her?
Johnny:
She's crazy about the wrong guy. Me. I am a loser. But if I had 20 bucks, I could be a winner.
Cully:
I hate myself for asking, but how?
Johnny:
This gypsy fortune-teller that's parked across the river. I hear that everybody who takes her advice is hitting it rich.
Cully:
So how come she lives in a wagon?
Johnny:
The wagon is loaded with gold. You got 20 bucks?
Cully:
Lucky for you, it just so happens…
Peg:
You are the lowest person that ever lived!
Cully:
Peg, my sweetheart. You've missed me.
Peg:
You're not what I've missed.
Cully:
No?
Peg:
No! I missed the $50 I hid in my winter lingerie.
Cully:
You know I never could keep out of your…
[Peg pokes cully with a pair of scissors]
Cully:
Oh! Oh! You didn't have to stab me.
Peg:
Oh, I should've listened to my sainted mother. She said you were just like my father.
Cully:
I could never drink that much.
Peg:
Don't you dare say one word about my drunken old man. Where's the money?
Cully:
I lost it, Peg. All of it, honest.
Johnny:
Yeah, he loaned me the last $
Peg:
Now you stay out of this. Just to convince me, you take off your shoes.
Cully:
My shoes?
Peg:
[shouts] Off!
Johnny:
Love and trust. That's what makes a marriage great.
Peg:
Yeah!
Cully:
See? I could never lie to you.
Peg:
Ha! Ha! Ha!
[Peg finds a $10 bill in Cully's shoe]
Peg:
Well... there's a $10 lie.
Cully:
Now, how did that get in there?
Peg:
I wonder. Oh!
[Leaves angry]
Johnny:
Goodbye, gypsy.
[Cully takes off his other shoe and gives Johnny two hidden $10 bills]
Johnny:
Hello, Zolita!
Princess Zolita:
The leaves are ready to speak.
Cully:
No lemon?
Gypsy:
The tea leaves have spoken.
Princess Zolita:
If you do not mind, I work alone!
Cully:
What do they spell, Mother?
Princess Zolita:
How lucky you are, the wheel of fortune has stopped at your number.
Johnny:
A wheel? That's roulette.
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2e
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Princess Zolita
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fe5
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:
And I see a dice table, too.
Cully:
No blackjack? This boy plays all games.
Princess Zolita:
And a new woman is coming into your life. A beautiful, young redhead.
Johnny:
It can't be a redhead, Princess. My girl's a blonde. Take another look.
Princess Zolita:
Now I see a blonde. Oh, but she has been bad luck for you. The tea leaves say... you will have good luck with the redhead.
Cully:
I know better, I married one. Take the advice of a 20-year loser, no redheads.
Princess Zolita:
He must not defy the tea leaves.
Cully:
How are you going to explain her to Frankie?
Johnny:
Why explain? We'll just use her to make a bundle.
Cully:
You're going to pass off a beautiful redhead as a good-luck piece? Good luck.
Gypsy:
If, uh, if I may be so crude.
Johnny:
Oh, sure.
[Johnny hands a $10 bill to the princess]
Gypsy:
If you please. The princess never soils her royal hands with money. $10? When the tea leaves promise a beautiful redhead, it is $
Cully:
A lot of money for a cup of tea. That's a gypsy for you. Takes all your dough so you can't take her advice.
Princess Zolita:
Minor problems like that I cannot solve.
Cully:
Maybe you can get another advance from Braden.
Johnny:
Not a chance. I'm already in for five weeks' salary.
Cully:
That you lost right back into his pocket. Braden's got a nice little thing going there.
Johnny:
Don't worry. Did you ever know a gambler who couldn't promote a little betting money?
Gypsy:
You also need Chesay.
Cully:
Chesay? Who's that?
Gypsy:
Chesay is gypsy good luck!
Peg:
Have you seen Cully? He's been missing for an hour.
Frankie:
Have you tried the lost-and-found department?
Peg:
No. I'm afraid they'll find him.
Frankie:
I always know where to find Johnny. In the casino losing his shirt.
Peg:
Well, with the way the other girls look at him, you're lucky he isn't playing around.
Frankie:
You know what I'd do if he ever did me wrong?
[pretends to point a gun to her head]
Peg:
Shoot yourself?
Frankie:
No, him.
Peg:
Oh.
Frankie:
[as Johnny walks in the room, Frankie pretends to shoot him]
[shouts]
Frankie:
Bang! Bang! Bang!
Johnny:
Oh!
[Johnny pretends to fall to his death]
Johnny:
One last request before I... cross the great footlights up yonder.
Frankie:
Like what?
Johnny:
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4c
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Like, would you loan me 25 bucks so I could pay Cully what I owe him?
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dd8
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Frankie:
Cully loaned you 25? Where did he get it?
Peg:
Between my nightgown and my petticoat.
Frankie:
Do you know how much you owe me already?
Johnny:
Who's counting?
Frankie:
Are you sure you don't want this money to gamble?
Johnny:
Word of honor and cross my heart and may you never kiss me again.
Frankie:
He sounds sincere. What would you do, Peg?
Peg:
What any woman with an ounce of pride or self-respect would do. Give him the money.
Johnny:
[as Frankie gets the money out for Johnny] Greatest little bank in America. Two greatest little banks in America.
Peg:
What a shame you don't have an account there.
Peg:
Hi, Mitzi.
[Peg notices that Mitzi is upset]
Peg:
Oh, the boss in a bad mood again?
Mitzi:
Bad? He never felt better. His favorite girl came back.
Peg:
Oh, I thought you were.
Mitzi:
I just found out I've been understudying the part. Oh, in my next life, I hope I'm not a girl. I could never go through that again.
Johnny:
Are you a real redhead?
Nellie Bly:
I'm a real everything.
Johnny:
What's your lucky number?
Nellie Bly:
One at a time.
Johnny:
One it is. Would you mind giving them your magic touch? Just for luck. You better get the bottom one too. By this time tomorrow, this ship should be the S.S. Johnny. What's your name, Lucky?
Nellie Bly:
Nellie. Nellie Bly.
Johnny:
Welcome aboard!
Cully:
That's it, Bly! I need a name to rhyme with "eye" for a new song I'm writing. Now I got it. Nellie Bly!
Johnny:
You're going to be made famous in a song.
Nellie Bly:
Well, I've tried every other way.
Johnny:
[as the roulette wheel spins] I don't even have to look. I know it's going to be number
[finally the tiny silver ball falls into the number "1" slot of the wheel]
Cully:
Ha! Ha! Maybe that gypsy knew something.
Johnny:
Maybe? My future just got here!
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