Al:
So, do you have any motto in life?
Justin Timberlake:
Um, I just think, if you're gonna do something, if you put out 150%, then you can always expect 100 back.
Al:
But then you wind up losing 50%. What a stupid motto.
Al:
Is there anything you'd like to do before we get started?
复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制
2f复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制
Céline Dion复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制
f94复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制
:
Umm, I want to play golf. I want to have a child. I want to, uh, drive my own car. I want to cook. I want to go to the groceries and buy my own tomatoes...
Al:
I'm afraid we don't have time for anything like that. What I meant was, "Can I get you a drink, or something?"
Céline Dion:
Yeah.
Al:
I'm sorry, WE'RE ALL OUT OF DRINKS.
Al:
Have you ever met Céline Dion?
Eminem:
I have felt like killing her before.
Al:
Well, obviously, we all have. Umm, ever felt like killing anybody else?
Eminem:
Y'know, most of my family members.
Al:
That's nice. Which reminds me, do you feel that you owe at least part of your success to the loving support that your family has given you over the years?
Eminem:
I don't owe nobody in my family nothin'.
Al:
You don't owe nobody in your family nothing? Wow, that's a triple negative. Does that mean you do owe somebody in your family something?
Eminem:
It's like, it's up to you to decide, you know?
Al:
Don't be nervous, but right now, there are literally dozens of people watching you.
Avril Lavigne:
What?
Al:
Well, what do you think all these cameras are for?
Avril Lavigne:
[curling into a ball] Oh my God, cameras, oh my god.
Al:
No, no Avril. Cameras are your friends. Cameras are here to help you. Cameras good.
Avril Lavigne:
[excitedly throwing arms into the air] Cameras.
Al:
So tell me, Celine, did you sing the boring song from "Titanic" or the stupid song from "Titanic"?
Al:
What's your favorite number?
Céline Dion:
Oh... I don't know... but not
Al:
Yeah, I know!
[shouts]
Al:
I hate fourteen!
Al:
Do you enjoy cracking your knuckles?
Céline Dion:
Yes.
Al:
Biting your toenails?
Céline Dion:
Yes.
Al:
Rolling around in the mud?
Céline Dion:
Yes.
Al:
Sticking gerbils together with crazy glue?
Céline Dion:
Yes.
Al:
Can I borrow five bucks?
Céline Dion:
No.
Al:
[shouts] Aaaah! It never works!
[Al introduces Britney Spears to Justin Timberlake]
Britney Spears:
Oh! It's Michael Jackson!
Al:
复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制
70复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制
What do you think of my new album, "Poodle Hat"? Would you say it is the best album in the world?
复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制
ecf复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制
Céline Dion:
I don't know... in a word... I guess so.
Al:
Hey, thanks.
Justin Timberlake:
Oh, they're big... really big.
Al:
Uh... Justin, what are you talking about?
Eminem:
Y'know what I'm sayin'?
Al:
I know what you're sayin'.
Eminem:
Y'know what I'm sayin'?
Al:
I know what you're sayin'.
Eminem:
Y'know what I'm sayin'?
Al:
Yes, I do.
Eminem:
Y'know what I'm sayin'?
Al:
Yes.
Eminem:
Y'know what I'm sayin'?
Al:
Yep.
Eminem:
Y'know what I'm sayin'?
Al:
I know what you're sayin'.
Eminem:
Y'know what I'm sayin'?
Al:
Yeah!
Eminem:
Y'know what I'm sayin'?
Al:
Yes! Yes!
Eminem:
Y'know what I'm sayin'?
Al:
YES!
Eminem:
Y'know what I'm sayin'?
Al:
YES!
Al:
[while Eminem rapidly repeats "Y'know what I'm sayin'?" eight times] Yes, I - I told ya - Look, I - I said that I - What? - I said I...
Al:
SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!
Eminem:
Y'know what I'm sayin'?
Al:
YES! YES! I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE SAYING! ALRIGHT?
Eminem:
Whatever.
Al:
You all know who my best friend in the whole wide world is? That's right! Harvey the Wonder Hamster!
[brings out Harvey]
Al:
Here he is! Hello, Harvey! My, he's looking happy today! Let's sing Harvey's theme song!
[sings]
Al:
Oh, Harvey, Harvey, Harvey the Wonder Hamster / He doesn't bite, and he doesn't squeal / He just runs around on his hamster wheel / Harvey, Harvey, Harvey the Wonder Hamster! /... Hey, Harvey!
[Music stops. Al throws Harvey over his shoulder off the building]
Al:
Well, that was fun.
Eminem:
I used to respect Will Smith but he pretty much dissed the whole Gender of rap.
Al:
The whole gender of Rap? Are you sure you don't mean genre. I don't mean to secong guess you or anything.复制复制成功复制失败，请手动复制
