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Billie Frank:
Irish Coffee, easy on the coffee!
Billie Frank:
Last night, I think I slept with a woman.
Billie Frank:
[shouting at Dave] That is what you do with the drink! You drink it! You can't eat it: nothing to chew! Can't wear it: no straps! Can't smoke it: wet! Drinks are meant to be drunk, much like myself! That's the familiar face: isn't that Billie Frank, the drunk?
Joe:
And the slut.
Billie Frank:
Right!
Haley:
I know you're in pain but I'm not sure cigarettes and cookies are the answer.
Billie Frank:
You're right. I'll get that pie.
Billie Frank:
[showing 2 dresses] Dave, come here for a second. Which one of these says: feel free to grope me in public?
Dave Parelli:
Oh, this one.
[looking at the other dress]
Dave Parelli:
This one's says: you're gonna have to buy me dinner first.
Billie Frank:
I think that we should do something that makes us feel better.
Dave Parelli:
What is there besides sex?
Billie Frank:
H鋋gen-Dazs!
Billie Frank:
Apparently God has chosen to punish me by making me work for someone who actually wants me to work.
Billie:
The first picture of me in my family album, I'm two days old and my mother's breast-feeding the doctor.
Dave:
Billie, this'll be hard but I need you to think of someone other than yourself for a moment...
Trudy Frank:
[to Billie] How dare you tell all your friends I'm a drunken potato-headed whore?
Billie Frank:
How do I know you don't badmouth me to your friends when I'm not there?
Trudy Frank:
Because, darling, when you're not here I forget all about you.
Dave Parelli:
Remember that anesthesiologist I was dating and I cheated on her with her sister? I just told her about it and she forgave me. We sat down, had a nice cup of tea, and...
[puzzled]
Dave Parelli:
and I don't really remember what happened after that.
Billie Frank:
Mom, with you in A.A., are you sure it's a good idea to *drink*?
Trudy Frank:
Don't be ridiculous darling, it's always a good idea to drink.
Billie Frank:
Mother, I'm in A.A. for real. I go every day. It's not a hobby, it's not a place to pick up guys - most of the time. I'm struggling with sobriety. You haven't even *met* sobriety.
Billie Frank:
Hi, I'm Billie, but all my friends call me "Oh Crap, Here Comes Billie."
Billie:
If I had known this praying crap actually worked, I would have started it long time ago. Next time I think I'll pray for a Porsche. You want anything?
Dave:
I don't think you're supposed to pray for the things that you want.
Billie:
What am I supposed to pray for, the things I don't want? Next time I'll pray for... herpes.
Dave:
No, you pray for the strength to accept God's will.
Billie:
You pray your way and I pray mine, okay?
Dave:
I like the sound the glass makes when the bartender puts it on the counter. I like the way it feels in my hand. I bring it in close, and I can smell it, and a wave of relief goes through my body even before I take the first sip.
Billie:
You're slow. I'd be on my third one by now.
Billie:
Why should you get what you want when I can't get what I want?
Dave:
Because life is unfair and I'm really horny.
Billie Frank:
Alright, alright, I admit it. I'm a fiscally irresponsible, emotionally unstable, former drunk. But that shouldn't *no way* prejudice your decision to maybe, you know, hopefully give me an advance?
Sidney Gibson:
An advance? You don't earn the money I pay you.
Billie:
May I confide in you as a friend?
Sidney Gibson:
No.
Billie:
Fine. Then as an acquaintance.
[she sighs and sits]
Billie:
You know, lately, my life has been really crappy. Yeah... haven't had sex in over months, my landlord is raising my rents!
Sidney Gibson:
So sleep with him.
Billie:
[asking for an advance] Hey, Siddy Sid Sid... you're like the mother I never had.
Sidney Gibson:
Forget it.
Billie:
Now you're like the mother I have.
Trudy Frank:
A drink without liquor? Oh, what's the point?
Billie Frank:
How about, driving your car legally, or maybe remembering your name... Or, not pursuing a liver at the age of fifty.
Trudy Frank:
Fifty? I beat the odds.
Trudy:
Because of me, you lived here, rent-free, for years.
Billie:
Mother, I was a child!
Trudy:
An ungrateful one.
Trudy Frank:
[to Billie] I gave you life! The least you could do is cheerfully answer the door.
Sidney Gibson:
[about the new web page Billie's supposed to take care of] Are we on the internet yet?
Billie Frank:
Didn't you hear the internet's closed today?
Jackie:
If anyone can bounce back, it's me; I'm like the Energizer Junkie.
Dave:
[to Billie] Hey, the next time you invite me to a family gathering, could you make sure it's not your family!
Billie Frank:
Come on Dave, please, I need your help, I'm begging you, and I don't usually beg! Well, not with my clothes on, anyway.
Billie:
Carl, what if I told you I was really drunk last night and... the only reason I slept with you is because, well, I don't know why I slept with you, *but* it's never gonna happen again.
Trudy:
[Billie just arrived at her mother's house] Oh Billie, would like a frozen Prozac on a stick? Or, as I'd like to call it - Frozac. It's great on those late summer afternoons when you're really depressed.复制复制成功复制失败,请手动复制