advertisement Ginger Grant: Wahine wiki huki luki nu, and I mean that from the bottom of my heart. Gilligan: That's beautiful. What's it mean? Ginger Grant: It means this bar is off-limits to all military personnel. Skipper Jonas Grumby: You don't know anything about space. Gilligan: I do know one thing. You take up more of it than I do. Gilligan: Hiya, Professor. What are you doing? Professor Roy Hinkley: I'm making notes for a book. It's to be a chronicle of our adventures on the island... I think it's a book people will want to buy, don't you? Gilligan: Sure, I'll buy one. I'm dying to find out what happens to us. Eunice Wentworth "Lovey" Howell: Anyone who says money can't buy happiness doesn't know where to shop. Professor Roy Hinkley: Well, that glue is permanent! There's nothing on the island to dissolve it. Why do you know what it would take? It would take a polyester derivative of an organic hydroxide molecule. Thurston Howell III: Watch your language! You're in the presence of a lady! Skipper Jonas Grumby: Ginger, I've got a problem... I've got a real problem... now you're a girl, right? Ginger Grant: Well, if you're not sure about that, you have got a problem! Skipper Jonas Grumby: Gilligan little buddy come with me. Gilligan: I'm not finished yet. Skipper Jonas Grumby: Gilligan come with me! Gilligan: I'm finished. Thurston Howell III: The 'Wizard of Wall Street' strikes again! Skipper Jonas Grumby: I'm not gonna marry that native girl! [the castaways have set up a courtroom and are conducting a trial] Thurston Howell III: Your Honor, will you get another gavel? Professor Roy Hinkley: Why? Thurston Howell III: That one's squirting milk all over me. [Later in the same courtroom sequence] Skipper Jonas Grumby: Ginger's very damaging to us. Gilligan: Yeah, her testimony. Skipper Jonas Grumby: No, her legs. [And finally... ] Thurston Howell III: I'd like to charge Mary Ann with murder. Professor Roy Hinkley: Murder? Thurston Howell III: Her testimony's killing me. Gilligan: You're a big man with a big head and - -... Skipper Jonas Grumby: Gilligan! Gilligan: And a big heart. Skipper Jonas Grumby: Oh, thank you. Thurston Howell III: What is this slop? Skipper Jonas Grumby: It's Gilligan's own creation, Mr. Howell, It's coconut pot pie. Gilligan: What was that stuff you just gave me? Eunice Wentworth "Lovey" Howell: That will help you sleep, it's a sedative. Gilligan: Thanks, Mrs. Howell, but you're wasting your time. Those things don't work on me. I remember once... [falls asleep] Gilligan: Skipper, should I pick the yellow bananas or the red bananas, because the yellow bananas are green. Skipper Jonas Grumby: Then pick the red ones. Gilligan: But the red ones are pink. Skipper Jonas Grumby: Gilligan, I don't care if you pick red white and blue bananas, just pick some bananas! Gilligan: Okay, Skipper... Blue bananas? Professor Roy Hinkley: I'll get Mr. Howell and we'll reconnoiter. Skipper Jonas Grumby: Alright, we'll get Mr. Howell and we'll reconnoiter. Come on. Gilligan: Okay, but I think we ought to scout around a bit first. Gilligan: Do those headhunters really collect heads, Professor? Professor Roy Hinkley: Yes, Gilligan. They boil them... they shrink them... and then they mount them on sticks. Gilligan: Eeeeeeew, what a crazy cane! Gilligan: Skipper, are you asleep? Skipper Jonas Grumby: [sarcastically] Yes. Gilligan: Oh, well when you wake up will you tell me if you've seen my rabbit's foot? Thurston Howell III: You goofed, didn't you? Robot: I am not programmed for that information. Thurston Howell III: I wonder what next year's models are gonna look like. Robot: I am not... Thurston Howell III: Oh shut up! Skipper Jonas Grumby: I guess it will be a long time before you'll eat another mushroom. Mary Ann Summers: You can say that again. Skipper Jonas Grumby: I guess it will be a long time... [laughs] Gilligan: Don't worry about mushrooms anymore, I got a book that tells all about them. Skipper Jonas Grumby: You do? Gilligan: Huh huh. Yeah, and it's called, "'How to Tell A Mushroom From a Toadstool'" by the late Dr. Morton Kepstone. Skipper Jonas Grumby, Mary Ann Summers: Late? Gilligan: Late? Professor Roy Hinkley: Listen, Gilligan, how far down was she? How many feet? Gilligan: Professor, in navy circles, we don't say "feet". We say "fathoms". Professor Roy Hinkley: Alright, how many fathoms? Gilligan: Oh I don't know, about 15 feet. Skipper Jonas Grumby: [upon finding a robot] Oh for goodness sakes, that's just what we needed. The tin fugitive from the Wizard of Oz. Skipper Jonas Grumby: If I were ever seen talking to this refugee from a junk yard, they'd think the skipper lost all his marbles. Robot: The skipper lost his marbles. Thurston Howell III: [pretending he's a Chief Headhunter] Moolah, moolah, moolah. [repeated line] Gilligan: Sorry, Skipper. [repeated line] Gilligan: Gee whiz, Professor! [repeated line] Skipper Jonas Grumby: Oh, Gilligan, not again! Gilligan: [Repeated line] Heh. Seeya later.