妙婿向钱冲 (1983)

d1b

Julio:

Can I call you Dad?

Monty:

[about his Mother-In-Law] She says I drink too much, I smoke too much, I gamble. I mean she's right, but what can I do? I got no... what's the word...

Nicky:

Class.

Mrs. Monahan:

You pollute the air with your smoking. You wreak of liquor and god knows what else. You're an ecological menace!

Monty:

Yeah, well you were the inspiration for twin beds!

Monty:

Yeah, well you where the inspiration for twin beds.

Clive Barlow:

Bartender I'll have a Perier with a twist

Louie the Bartender:

I'm sorry I only have it on Draft

fat anthony's grand mother:

Montey, did you ever see a face like this.

Monty:

No. If I did I'd remember it.

Monty:

Nicky, just in time.

Monty:

I didn't want to see her fucking face.

Monty:

Mother.

Belinda Capuletti:

Someday I'll be out of you're life.

Monty:

Yeah, well for now get out of the bathroom.

Saleslady:

May I help you

Monty:

No, we're just browsing

Saleslady:

How long do you intend to browse

Monty:

that lady over there, You didn't ask her how long she's going to browse.

Saleslady:

You don't look like browsers

Nicky:

Yeah, what do browsers look like.

Monty:

Yeah, maybe I'm half browser.

Nicky:

Yeah, on his mother's side.

Monty:

My mother-in-law, for years I wouldn't kiss her face; I end up kissing her ass.

Allison Capuletti:

[as Monty is walking her down the aisle during her wedding ceremony] He's everything I ever wanted.

Monty:

You don't ask for much do you?