advertisement Laura: I should've kicked her in the face! I should've scratched out her eyes! Laura: Why don't you give like the rest of the children? Nellie Oleson: My mother say's we're not like the rest of the children! Laura: I suppose she's right. Caroline: I'll be working for Nellie. It's not the same. Charles: Besides a few pounds, there's no difference. Nellie Oleson: Hello, Laura. Laura: Hi, Nellie. Nellie Oleson: Willie told me all about your class project. How's yours coming? Laura: I haven't started it yet. Nellie Oleson: I see. It must be very hard tracing all your relatives. Names and everything. Have to spend all that time in the forest or wherever it is you're from. Laura: It's called the Big Woods and I'll manage thank you. Nellie Oleson: You know the Oleson family goes all the way back to royalty. We come from heads of state and titles for most of my relatives. Laura: Like Nero and Ivan the Terrible? Nellie Oleson: I'll fix her. You'll see. Mrs. Oleson: Laura Ingalls! Where is the filthy animal? Laura: Nellie you're mother wants you! (Laura pushes Nellie down the hill in her wheelchair) You're a good friend, Nellie! A good friend! [Nellie's wheelchair rolls down the hill and she lands in a horse trough. She stands up, completely wet] Mrs. Oleson: My baby... It's a miracle... (She faints) Nellie Oleson: What's so secretive? Laura: Nothing. Nellie Oleson: Whispering's rude! Laura: So is listening in on the people who are doing it! [discussing the birth of Caroline Ingalls' fourth child] Mrs. Oleson: Well, in my case, Nellie and Willie were MORE than enough. Caroline: In the case of Nellie and Willie, Mrs. Oleson, I'd have to agree with you. Laura: I wanted to clean the blackboards extra good today, to make up for being late. Mary Ingalls Kendall: And talking in class? Laura: I was NOT talking! Mary Ingalls Kendall: You were, too! Laura: Was NOT! Nellie was TALKING and I was ANSWERING. Nellie Oleson: I wonder why Laura Ingalls doesn't come in the store anymore? Willie Oleson: Because she's too poor to buy anything - that's why! Nellie Oleson: So's her father. Mother says he can't even afford to pay what he owes in the store. He just spends all day cleaning up after horses. Laura: My pa works hard. Nellie Oleson: So does a mule. Laura: Pa, can I ride Bunny into town instead of riding in the wagon? Charles: I guess so, but is that because you feel like riding or because you want to make Nellie jealous? Laura: [pause] A little of both, I guess. Caroline: [Mrs. Oleson has caused a student to run out of the schoolhouse] Children! Can any of you spell "compassion"? Can any of you spell "understanding"? Will any of you tell us the meaning of these words? [pause] Caroline: Well, don't feel bad children - I don't think Mrs. Oleson knows the meaning to these words, either. Laura: [referring to Johnny Johnson] I think he's the best looking boy in the whole school. Mary Ingalls Kendall: That's not saying much! Julia Sanderson: Charles... I'm gonna die. Charles: [shocked] What? Julia Sanderson: I'm going to die. That's a heck of a thing to tell a neighbor, isn't it? Laura: I hate that Nellie Oleson! Caroline: Laura! Don't say "hate" - don't even think "hate"! I'm sure Nellie has her good qualities somewhere. Charles: Your ma's right, half-pint. Now on the way home, we'll try and think of some! Nellie Oleson: Half the time, you don't even SMELL like a girl! You're either sweaty, or you stink of fish! Laura: Well... I sweat a lot and I fish a lot! Mrs. Oleson: [after an argument] Mrs. Ingalls, we will not be requiring any more eggs in the immediate future. Caroline: Mrs. Oleson, the hens will be RELIEVED to hear that! Alice Garvey: Sometimes I wonder how Harriet Oleson has managed to stay alive for as long as she has! Laura: You know something, Mary...? Mary Ingalls Kendall: No, what? Laura: Life sure is a lot easier when you don't like boys! Mary Ingalls Kendall: That Nellie Oleson is the meanest girl I ever did see! I could never be as mean as that! Laura: I could - meaner! [pause] Laura: If Ma and Pa would let me! Mrs. Oleson: [to her husband, who holds a shotgun, when they catch daughter Nellie with her new husband] Nels - make her a WIDOW! [Nellie has stomach pains] Mrs. Oleson: Do you know what I think it is? I think it's that strange food you make for your husband! Nellie Oleson: But he likes it, and it doesn't make him sick! Mrs. Oleson: Well, of course HE likes it - he's used to it! He's Jewish. A person can get used to ANYTHING! Look at the cannibals... they eat each other, and they think it's just dandy! Reverend Robert Alden: [at Julia Sanderson's funeral] Julia Sanderson asked me to read this today. She wrote it for all of you, loved ones and friends alike... 擱emember me with smiles and laughter, for that is how I'll remember you all. If you can only remember me with tears, then don't remember me at all"... loud and clear. Charles: I pray and I pray... why doesn't God listen? Reverend Robert Alden: He listens, Charles. He doesn't always answer in the way that we want, but in a way He thinks is best for each of us. Charles: How can taking the sight from a fifteen year old girl be the best thing, Reverend? Reverend Robert Alden: Believe me, Charles. God has chosen Mary for some very special purpose. Charles: Tomorrow, I have to tell my daughter that she's going blind. What shall I tell her is that special purpose? Mary Ingalls Kendall: [the tragic moment, when Mary Ingalls awakens to discover she has lost her sight] Help me, Pa! HELP ME! Pa, I can't SEE! Hold me! It's dark! I'm scared, Pa! Hold me! It's too dark! I can't breathe! Laura: Hard working folks only smell bad to people who have nothing better than stick their noses in the air! Well, whenever you stick your nose in the air with me, Nellie Oleson, it's going to get punched! Albert Quinn Ingalls: Ma, please don't tell me I'm too young to know how I feel! Caroline: I wasn't going to tell you that, and don't ever raise your voice to me while you live in this house. Almanzo James Wilder: [trying to give Laura a nickname] What's your given name? Laura: Laura Elizabeth Ingalls. Almanzo James Wilder: Laura Elizabeth... [pause] Almanzo James Wilder: How about Beth? Mrs. Oleson: If God wanted me to talk with my hands, he wouldn't have given me a mouth. Nelson "Nels" Oleson: [looks toward the camera very seriously] I guess even God can make mistakes! Nelson "Nels" Oleson: [to Mrs. Oleson] You should be locked up in a cage and fed with a stick; you have made life miserable for everyone. Mrs. Oleson: My back is killing me again... [in the presence of Mrs. Ingalls] Nelson "Nels" Oleson: [doing inventory on his shoes] ... and again, and again... Mrs. Oleson: What did you say? Nelson "Nels" Oleson: I'm just counting these shoe sizes dear. And a ten and a ten, four sizes. Mrs. Oleson: You disgraced me in front of the town. Reverend Robert Alden: [trying to heal their broken marriage] Please - there must be forgiveness! Nelson "Nels" Oleson: Don't talk to me about forgiveness 'til you lived with a woman like that! Mrs. Oleson: tssskkk [both of them leave the church] [repeated line] Nancy Oleson: YOU HATE ME! [repeated line] Mrs. Oleson: Oh, for HEAVEN'S sakes!