Arlo Guthrie: Group W is where they putcha if you may not be moral enough to join the army after committin' your special crime. There was all kinds of mean, nasty ugly-lookin' people on the bench there. There was mother rapers... father stabbers... father rapers... Father rapers! Sittin' right there on the bench next to me! Officer Obie: Kid, I'm going to put you in the cell, I want your wallet and your belt. Arlo Guthrie: Obie, I can understand you wanting my wallet so I don't have any money to spend in the cell, but what do you want my belt for? Officer Obie: Kid, we don't want any hangings. Arlo Guthrie: Obie, did you think I was going to hang myself for littering? Officer Obie: Want your wallets and your belts. Put everything on the desk. Arlo Guthrie: I can understand you wanting our wallets, so we don't have any money to spend in the cell, but what do you want our belts for? Officer Obie: Kid, we don't want any hanging. Arlo Guthrie: [pause] Obie, do you think we're gonna hang ourselves for littering? Arlo Guthrie: Just what I've always wanted. Alice Brock: A restaurant? Arlo Guthrie: No, a friend with a restaurant. Alice Brock: Take off those handcuffs! Officer Obie: You're interfering in the performance of my duties. Alice Brock: You're a meathead - haven't you play-acted cop enough for one day? Officer Obie: This side is reserved for officers of the law and criminals. Alice Brock: Pig-eyed idiot! Officer Obie: Alice, I've had enough garbage for one day, yours and theirs. Alice Brock: Stupid bastard! Officer Obie: Alice... Alice Brock: Cradle hopper! Officer Obie: Alice! Alice Brock: Turkey raper! Arlo Guthrie: Obie, when do we get our bread and water? Officer Obie: Shut up, kid. Arlo Guthrie: Girdles feel funny.