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Jesse Reese:
Why don't you carry any weapons?
The Huntress:
I am the weapon.
Harleen:
Just goes to show you, never send a business man to do a psychopath's job.
[prologue]
Alfred:
Legend tells of a caped crusader, Batman, guardian of New Gotham, and his one, true love, Catwoman, the queen of the criminal underworld. Their passion left behind something extraordinary: a daughter, Huntress. Half meta-human, she has taken up her father's mantle and fights to protect the innocent and helpless. Joining her in this struggle, Oracle, once Batman's protégé, Batgirl, she was caught in the crossfire of the war between Batman and Joker. Now she fights crime a different way, a master of the cyber-realms and trainer to heroes. Together, they have taken in Dinah, a meta-human herself, with powers that she is only beginning to explore. These three are the protectors of New Gotham: the Birds of Prey. My name is Alfred Pennyworth and this is their story.
Barbara Gordon:
Hey, time out, there will be absolutely no use of superpowers to settle domestic disagreements!
Helena Kyle:
Oh, no ... you do NOT mess with the outfit!
Harley Quinn:
That's my boy!
Barbara Gordon:
[To Helena] Canary and your mom never really got along ... I think it was some sort of bird-cat thing.
Jesse Reese:
"Darkstrike?" Who comes up with these names?
Claude:
When the last one of you dies, I'll be alone. I'll be free.
Helena Kyle:
And I'M the one in therapy ...
Helena Kyle:
Do you have any idea how hard it is to find clothes that look sexy?
Helena Kyle:
[To Dinah] News Flash, it's high school. The closest thing our society has to institutionalized torture.
Jesse Reese:
Why won't you just tell me your name?
Helena Kyle:
Because the first time we met, you asked me who I was. But last night, you asked me WHAT I was. I won't tell you my name ... you haven't earned it.
Helena Kyle:
Slow down, you're driving like a maniac!
Barbara Gordon:
When did you become the back-seat driver from hell?
Helena Kyle:
Gazillion dollars worth of computer equipment and not one jar of peanut butter!
Helena Kyle:
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You know, I'm the one that does all the night sweeps. I'm the one that does all the fieldwork. I'm the one with bruises in really embarrassing places. Would it kill you to go to the grocery store every once in a while?
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fea
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Barbara Gordon:
What is this obsession with food?
Helena Kyle:
You try fighting the forces of evil when your blood sugar's low!
Lady Shiva:
Why can't you do it? I would've killed you all!
Barbara Gordon:
I know, Shiva ... Sandy. That's the difference between us.
Alfred:
[To Barbara] Batgirl was strong but impetuous. You've grown into a thoughtful, beautiful woman with the capacity to care more for others than you do for yourself. And if that's not a hero, I don't know what is.
Alfred:
A good butler does not eavesdrop ... he discreetly overhears.
Barbara Gordon:
We thought we could do no wrong. We ruled Gotham's nights and answered to no one but ourselves.
Alfred:
If I may be so blunt, Miss Barbara ... this mask ... this suit ... no longer fits.
Helena Kyle:
The drinking came after the driving ... and armed robbery ... but before the dancing and strip poker.
Barbara Gordon:
[Talking About Dinah] She could be every bit as great as you.
Carolyn Lance:
And she could get shot at before breakfast, tortured before lunch, and knocked unconscious for dinner also like me.
Harley Quinn:
I mean, really, he is the perfect child for the busy career woman: Low maintenance. No sleep deprivation. They don't live long enough to borrow the car.
Helena Kyle:
You killed a man. Even though it was an accident, you cannot do that!
Guy:
Why not? He was bad.
Helena Kyle:
Good point.
Helena Kyle:
This whole thing is gonna send me straight to my shrink.
Guy:
Why do we live inside a big clock?
Dinah:
Uh, he has a point.
Helena Kyle:
Hey, don't look at me. I didn't pick it. Senior superhero chooses the lair.
Harley Quinn:
Me and my Mr. J, we would have had such beautiful children -- my green eyes and his green hair.
Helena Kyle:
I don't know what to do, Alfred.
Alfred:
Welcome to parenthood.
Harley Quinn:
[To Her Chief Henchman] Take your men and go find my baby. Shouldn't be too difficult -- just follow the mayhem.
Guy:
You know, you just feel sorry for me 'cause I'm a freak.
Dinah:
Oh, please. Like the three of us are so aggressively normal.
Helena Kyle:
[Discussing Dinah] What are you gonna do when she's out past curfew? Blast her with your Canary Cry?
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Carolyn Lance
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:
What did your mother do? Oh, that's right. She was too busy stealing your childhood.
Barbara Gordon:
I don't think we should interfere.
Helena Kyle:
We interfere for a living.
Barbara Gordon:
[Discussing Dinah] Have a heart, Helena. I took you in at the same age.
Helena Kyle:
Yeah. And I used to lie to you all the time ... only I was better at it.
Barbara Gordon:
Uh ... not THAT much better.
Harleen:
The city is gonna pay for what they did to my sweet Mr. J.
Helena Kyle:
[About Dinah] She's dangerous when she's pissed, huh?
Barbara Gordon:
[To Dinah] Don't let vengeance get in the way of finishing your mom's work.
Barbara Gordon:
Dealing with demons is never easy, whether they're on the outside or the inside.
Barbara Gordon:
Looks like our Wallwalker's neuro-electrical pulse activates some kind of ... molecular dispersion. That's what enables him to pass through inanimate objects.
Helena Kyle:
And here I just thought he was just really skinny ...
Dinah:
Do you trust me?
Barbara Gordon:
Dinah, if you wanted really, REALLY wanted someone dead ... they'd be dead.
Helena Kyle:
[About Reese] He's not my boyfriend. Boyfriends share things with girlfriends. They don't hide massive secrets!
Dinah:
You're techno babbling.
Oracle:
I think therefore the chair moves.
Helena Kyle:
Men! Can't live with them, might as well beat the crap out of them.
Barbara Gordon:
Are we still talking about work here?
Helena Kyle:
Of course we are. What else is there?
Barbara Gordon:
I'm not going anywhere near that one.
Jesse Reese:
I thought you worked alone.
Helena Kyle:
I keep trying.
Helena Kyle:
Our jobs are supposed to be so easy: Find the bad guys, kick the crap out of 'em, feel good, and go home.
Barbara Gordon:
Just because something looks simple doesn't mean it is ... and nothing worth having in this life is easy.
Helena Kyle:
I like to look at the law as sort of a guideline, kind of a helpful suggestion.
Alfred:
Oh, Mistress Harley... buttle this!
Helena Kyle:
[On why she refuses to wear a mask]
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I wanna look good. Is that a crime? I can have two lives without looking like an overgrown trick-or-treater.
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Barbara Gordon:
Before I was ever Oracle, I had another name, another identity, another... self. I used to work with a man, Helena's father. He was Gotham's greatest champion... and most people never even knew he existed.
Det. Claude Martin:
A generation ago, there was a man, a vigilante who prowled New Gotham's nights claiming he was fighting for justice. All the while, and I'm not kidding about this, he was dressed as a bat!
Jesse Reese:
Okay. Now I know you're messing with me. A grown man, fights crime, and he does it dressed as a giant flying rodent.
Det. Claude Martin:
I think it's safe to assume he had some issues. He called himself the Bat-Man.
Jesse Reese:
Okay, now that's creative.
Det. Claude Martin:
Well I didn't make it up. The point is he attracted criminals. It was a prestige thing to find him, you know, make your mark in the underworld.
Jesse Reese:
That only explains why there are so many criminals in New Gotham. I mean all metahumans can't be criminals.
Det. Claude Martin:
Why not? Their kind is drawn to crime they think they're above the law.
Jesse Reese:
What about this flying bat-guy? He fought crime, he was a metahuman.
Det. Claude Martin:
Oh, no, no, he was human all the way. He just, you know, had a scary dress sense. Anyway he vanished about seven years ago but the metahumans stayed. Had families, built lives here, they're here still. Some, even married humans. You don't even want to know how screwed up those kids are. You know what I'm talking about, Reese, I can tell.
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